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Buddhist mother-in-law reads chants over grandchild for healing

Question

A Muslim lady married to a convert Muslim boy whose mother is a Buddhist, they lived together peacefully without religious differences. They have a 10 months old child. Whenever child get ill, or any event, the Buddhist grandmother tries to do some Buddhist rituals which is sometimes leads to shirk. Now arguments erupt between Mother in law and the Lady. Whereas Mother in law says that we have to do anything or any religious ritual to cure the child whereas lady says this is not right according to Muslim belief, infect its Haram. But the Mother in law never accept those thing, according to her doing anything to cure the child is right. Father of the child is not bother these problem as lack of Islamic knowledge. The issues got worse they live in a turmoil. What the Muslim lady should do ? just ignore the issue ?

Answer

All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad  sallallaahu  `alayhi  wa  sallam ( may  Allaah exalt his mention ) is His slave and Messenger.

Every child is a trust in the care of their parents – they are responsible for them before Allaah. Ibn ‘Umar  may  Allaah  be  pleased  with  him said: I heard the Prophet  sallallaahu  `alayhi  wa  sallam ( may  Allaah exalt his mention ) say: “Every one of you is a guardian and is responsible for those under his guardianship … and a man is a guardian in his house and is responsible for those under his guardianship, and a woman is a guardian in her husband's home and she is responsible for those under her guardianship.” [Al-Bukhari and Muslim]

Therefore, it is not permissible to let the grandmother perform chants on the child in accord with her rituals of unbelief. In addition to being forbidden, this could lead to the child being affected by his grandmother, and could even be a cause of him being led astray in the future.

So, the wife should advise her husband in a gentle and soft manner and explain to him the seriousness of this matter, and that it is not permissible to be negligent about it. She also has the right to demand a separate house where she can avoid anything that could cause her distress. In Islam, she is not obliged to live in the same house as her mother-in-law. Please refer to Fatwa 84608.

What the mother-in-law said – that she can use whatever means she likes to heal the child – is not correct. Her son, i.e. the husband, should explain to her that this is something that our Sharee'ah does not agree with, and it is not permissible for him to agree with her on matters that involve falsehood. However, he should be gentle with her and if she gets angry, he should be dutiful to her until she is satisfied. For more benefit, please refer to Fatwa 275419.

Allaah Knows best.

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