His adoptive family objects to his choice for marriage
6-3-2008 | IslamWeb
Question:
Salaam, i am in a situation where i have been adopted and live with my guardians in England and my parents who i have little contact with live in Pakistan. 2 years ago i met a non-muslim girl who i wanted to marry but my guardians objected to this. I then left the house to be with the girl and 8 months later reconciled with my guardians and came back home. The girl then decided to revert to Islam so she could marry me and we were planning to do so. Due to some misunderstandings the wedding was cancelled, and my guardians have told me that i either stay at home and forget her or i leave the family in order to be with her and they will never speak to me again! Also my guardian has loaned me some money to invest in a business, which i am repaying monthly, and has asked that i relinquish my shares in the business if i leave the house. I would like to know whether i can still marry this girl, who has helped me find Islam and give up certain bad habits i had, without my guardians consent, although her parents consent to the Islamic marriage, and whether my guardian can rightfully demand that i relinquish my shares in the business due to his disagreement of my marriage? I look forward to hearing from you soon, jazakallah khair.
Answer:
All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, is His slave and Messenger.
We have already issued Fataawa 84422 and 82371 clarifying that adoption is forbidden. Therefore, you are obliged to be traced back to your real father and not to anybody else. As regards the man who adopted you, he is not your father and his wife is not your mother. Hence, you should bear this in mind.
As regards the girl whom you mentioned, if she is religious and has a good moral conduct, then you can marry her even if the said family does not agree as they have no religious right to prevent you from this. They also have no right to prevent you from your share in the business which you mentioned because of you marrying this girl.
However, we advise you to discuss with them (with wisdom and respect) about these matters, especially that they were kind to you as they nurtured you.
Finally, you may seek the help of some pious and righteous people who would discuss with this family and try to convince them.
Allaah Knows best.