Needs Khul' to rid herself of her negligent husband and his abusive family
20-6-2010 | IslamWeb
Question:
As salamualaikum,my sister got married to a muslim,divorcee teacher by profession the reason he gave for the divorce was he alleged that the girl was squarely to be blamed and as usual disown any misdoing by him or his family and said they are innocent my dad did send some relatives to confirm if the divorce was final some communication gap was there clear complete picture did not evovled (i work abroad).My sister got married in 1998 things went bad in laws treated her badly abused hit and the real secret is the boy has sexual problem impotence or erectional dysfunction which was hidden and the reason for his previous divorce.he is dependent on drugs to have errection.by allah's grace my sister got pregnant and delivered a male child in 2000 now as per islamic ruling if a person has a sexual intercourse even once he cannot be said as impotence .But fact is he cannot perform his sexual duties satisfactoril & they do sihr too.Also since almost 7 to 8 years major part of the married life is been seperate the boy is not at all concern about anything no communication no enquiry about the child no financial support total aleniation from wife relation is ZERO now what is the status of marriage not in touch how is khula possible if he is not ready to divorce my sister or take her back with dignity and not abuse her right being totally disregarded if the husvand cannot defend his wife from being illtreated by sisters father in law nothing worked all efforts were futile reconciliation seems impossible how to nullify the marriage my sister is staying in my house since last few years Allah hafiz
Answer:
All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad 
is His slave and Messenger.
The fact that the two spouses are apart from each other – even if it is for a long period of time – does not mean that the marital bond came to an end. Hence, if the husband did not divorce his wife or a judge did not rule that they are divorced, then their marriage is still valid; for more benefit, please refer to Fatwa 82732.
On the other hand, this husband is Islamically required to have good marital relationship with his wife; Allaah Says (what means): {And live with them in kindness.}[Quran 4:19] Among living with her in kindness, is fulfilling her desires. As regards him leaving her like this, neither divorced nor married, then this is not permissible. Therefore, he should be advised either to keep her in kindness or divorce her in kindness as Allaah ordered in His Book.
Also, among living with her in kindness, is that he fulfills his obligation of spending on her and on his children from her and if he is negligent in this regard without having a sound reason, then he is sinful. ‘Abdullaah Ibn ‘Umar 
narrated that the Prophet said: “It is enough a sin for a person not to provide means of sustenance to those whom he is obliged to support.” [Ahmad and Abu Daawood]
Moreover, if a husband does not spend on his wife the obligatory spending for a given period, then this does not render him exempted from this spending; rather, it becomes a loan that he is obliged to pay according to the view of the majority of the scholars 
whether or not he had a sound reason for leaving her. As regards the spending on the children, it is also permissible to ask the father for a reimbursement if the one who spent on them did so with the intention of asking the father to reimburse him for doing so; for more benefit, please refer to Fatwa 85012.
In any case, if a husband did not spend on his wife, or that she is harmed because of him not having sexual intercourse with her, then it becomes permissible for her to take the case to an Islamic judge so that the latter would order the husband to fulfill his obligations towards his wife or rather divorce her from him even in return for compensation that she pays to him. For more benefit, please refer to Fatwa 89039.
As regards the mistreatment which you mentioned on the part of this wife’s in-laws and them transgressing her, if it is true, then this is evil and the husband should have repelled their harm from her.
Finally, it should be noted that the wife has the right in a separate accommodation as we clarified in Fatwa 84608.
Allaah Knows best.