Matters related to Khul'
2-12-2012 | IslamWeb
Question:
Respected Mufti Sahab, I have requested for khula from a Qazi court of Karachi which is also known as family court. I have been granted marriage dissolution on the last day of pre-trial and my x-husband was also present providing reasons to judge against divorce. I took khula on following grounds: 1- he had none basic knowledge of Islamic rules and norms although he was an hafiz, but did not know difference between na-mehram and mehram. 2- the whole family fought and argued on trivial matters and my -husband and x father in law abused me and my family alot. 3- he went away on far away trips with his bhabi and obliged her to an extent which was not accpetable for me. 4- he disconnected communication with me and my family for long and we tried everything in our power to resume it. 5- my rukhsati did not happen because he had no plans for it 6- encourgae all sort of bidats and rituals wanted me to limit my extent of parda 7- there were huge mental compatibility gap among us and I tried my level best to make teh relationship work but it was not in our fate. therefore, I requested for Khula. My question is I have been told by few Immams that my khula did not happen as he did not sign any legal papers and did not utter the word talaq, am I going to be bonded with him even if I get marriage dissolution from an Islamic court or qazi court? what is the solution in Islam for such cases? Why Mufti and Alim hold such a negative attitude towards Khula as me and my parents have been tolerating harsh behaviour ever since. how a women, who wants to live according to suunah and Islam, solves this khula problem? when a male is not competent enough or ugly Islam gives right to women for talaq, how come I cn not get it on moral grounds? Please answer me I am in a desperate state. JazakAllah Al Khair
Answer:
All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, is His slave and Messenger.
In principle, it is not permissible for a wife to ask for Khul’ from her husband without having a sound reason. It is confirmed that the Prophet, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, said: “The wives who ask for Khul’ are the hypocrites.” [Ahmad and At-Tirmithi]
Nonetheless, if the wife has a sound reason, it becomes permissible for her to ask for Khul’. Therefore, if you are harmed by staying with your husband, or hate to stay with him, then it is permissible for you to ask for Khul’. For more benefit, please refer to Fatwa 89039.
However, Khul’ cannot take place except with the consent of both parties – we mean the husband and wife – this is in principle, but some scholars 
stated that there are some cases when Khul’ takes place even without the consent of both spouses.
As regards signing official papers, then this is not necessary. Rather, if an Islamic court issued this Khul’, it becomes effective because the Muslim judge would not take the initiative to issue Khul’ except after the Islamic considerations have been met (and confirmed to him). Indeed, the scholars stated that if the ruling of the Muslim judge is based on strong evidence from the Book of Allaah or the Sunnah of the Prophet, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, or the consensus of the scholars, then it is not permissible to refute it.
Hence, if your waiting period (after Khul’) has expired, it becomes permissible for you to marry another man, but it is more appropriate to finalize the marriage contract in an Islamic court so that this would prevent any negative reactions from your ex-husband; this is the answer to your question ‘how can a women, who wants to live according to the Sunnah and Islam, solve this Khul’ problem?.’
We did not understand what you meant by your statement: ‘Why the Mufti and 'Aalim hold such a negative attitude towards Khul’. If you mean what you previously pointed out that the Khul’ is not valid because the husband did not sign the official papers, then the scholar [who issued such a Fatwa] may have his own Ijtihaad (i.e. the effort a jurist makes to deduce the verdict) about it, so one should seek excuses for him.
As regards your statement ‘Islam gives right to women for talaaq (divorce)…..etc.’ , then the answer is as we have already mentioned that if the wife is harmed by staying with her husband, then this is a sound reason for her to ask for divorce or Khul’.
Finally, we would like to draw your attention to the following matters:
1. The husband is Islamically required to have a good marital relationship with his wife as Allaah Says (what means): {And live with them in kindness.} [Quran 4:19] So, if the husband mistreats his wife and he does not contact her for a long time, then this contradicts the above Divine Order.
2. The in-laws should have good relations with each other because of this bond (marital relationship) that links them. Indeed, the Prophet, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, used to have good relations with his in-laws.
3. A husband should be a good example for his wife and he should help her in doing good, and not be a follower of Bid'ah (religious innovation) trying to influence her in a bad way regarding her abidance of the Hijab.
May Allaah enable us all to do what pleases Him and whatever He likes.
Allaah Knows best.