Married over the Internet without the consent of her Wali
23-1-2013 | IslamWeb
Question:
Assasalamualikum . I got marry by phone with one man who is of our country and muslim and lived in abroad . We did not see live each other. only one day we saw each other with web came.We introduced with internet. He said at first he is divorced only and no child .He proposed me to marry but I was unmarried and he was divorced and later he said he had 3 daughters also. About him I said to my mom and brother but they did not agree about marry with him. I said him all but he cried much and I was little emotional about him. I got marry him by phone whithout our guardian and in marry time only marriage office organize 2 witness and mowlana. But he was another country and nobody with him. We listened only from his mouth Kobul by phone. In my side mowlana said doa and I said kobul and surah. Me and 2 witness signatured in marriage paper. Marriage office prepared our marriage certificate by lawyer there was our photo and only my signature. I sent this paper to him by dhl. May be he signatured in that paper .He said he needs that marriage paper. He used to make phone to me and sometimes we talked. I understoood his behave is very bad and sometimes he provoked me like man of slum. Later I understood for his behave his x wife left him. Actually he was a very angry people. After 1 year he came to my country and made ph that time I was changed and controlled me about him. I thought if I would lived with him after 1/2 months I could divorced him. Thats why I said him my family arranged my marriage with another man. I can't relation with you but I made phone to him several times to give him divorce letter but he avoided me. Now I have doubt that marry was legal or not? I made divorce letter but could not give him. There was problem to send letter. Is it mendatory to give him divorce letter? In this situation can I marry another person? Please let me know. Thanks a lot.
Answer:
All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, is His Slave and Messenger.
Marriage is not an easy matter; rather, it is a long journey in one’s life and it requires carefulness and patience before a girl chooses someone as a desired husband.
It is unacceptable negligence that some girls agree to marry a man just by knowing him through the Internet and so on. So, he pretends to be righteous, pious and having good manners, then it becomes clear that the matter is otherwise. Therefore, we warn against doing this.
The best way to marry is that a girl should start by supplicating Allaah to bless her with a righteous husband, and once she finds someone who is willing to marry her, she should ask trustworthy people who know him about his religion and his moral conduct. Then, if they say good about him, she should perform the Istikhaarah prayer about him. For more benefit about the Istikhaarah prayer, please refer to Fatwa 81434.
Of course, the marriage contract cannot be valid unless it meets certain conditions, the most important of which is the presence of the woman's guardian and two witnesses. For more benefit, please refer to Fatwa 83629.
Therefore, it is not permissible for a woman to marry herself off, as such a marriage is void. Besides, it is not enough to take the consent of the husband over the phone; rather, he or his representative must be present at the time of the contract. Also, him signing the paper of marriage or not signing it does not have any effect. For more benefit, please refer to Fatwa 83780. In brief, this marriage is void and it must be invalidated.
However, for separation to take place, the husband should issue divorce or the Islamic judge or whoever can act on his behalf, like Islamic Centres, should invalidate the marriage. For more benefit, please refer to Fatwa 92478.
As regards this woman marrying another man before divorce taking place and before the end of the waiting period, then she is not permitted to do so. Also, just signing the divorce papers does not lead to divorce unless the husband had intended it.
Allaah Knows best.