Multiple incidents of divorce
8-3-2016 | IslamWeb
Question:
Assalamu alaykum. I am mother with two children and I am nurse. My husband has uttered divorce by another word without the intention. Eight years ago, I was on duty and my duty finished but because still I had a patient for an operation I could not go home early. My husband called me and insisted that I go home. I tried to explain, but he insisted. I gave my mobile phone to another female doctor to explain it to him. He said to the doctor, "If my wife does not go home now, she got one." He did not have the intention but only wanted to scare me. After a few days, we went to a shaykh. He said that the divorce was invalid but that he had to pay an expiation for ten poor people, which he did. Another time, we were eating and he was very angry and started to shout at me and threw rice at my face. He continue shouting and saying bad words untill he coninuously pronounced the divorce, maybe four or five times. I was even scared from him at that time. He was mad. Afterwards, he said that he had lost control and did not have the intention to pronounce the divroce. Please, was this a valid divorce or not? My husband was took me back after a few days because he thought that was a valid divorce. For the last one, he went to court and was angry. He sad to the court that he already divorce his wife a first and second and now a third time. After a few days, my father-in-law informed me of the divorce. I was shocked to hear that news. After a few week, he felt much regret and wanted to return back to me. When he was in court, he totally forgot that the first divorce was invalid and that he paid an expiation. Now we are trying to return back to one another but the court does not want to help us at all. One shaykh made the divorce papers for us. He said that as long as there is a divorce paper from the court nothing can be changed at all. Please, I really need help. According to the sharia, how many divorces did I get? And please give me a fatwa. Please, I need advise because we want to return back to each other and we have children. I cannot understand the court system. Please, I need your urgent reply. May Allaah reward you.
Answer:
All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah and that Muhammad 
is His slave and Messenger.
If the court that issued the ruling that divorce had taken place is an Islamic court, then we have nothing to say. The Muslim judge is more aware of his ruling. Your husband may go back to him and inform him about the reality of the first divorce. However, if that court was not an Islamic court, then you may consult the institutions specialized in looking at the issues of the Muslims, such as the Islamic Centers.
We have to alert to the seriousness of what your husband is doing and for having bad marital relations with his wife, as he is Islamically ordered to have good marital relations with you. Allaah says (what means): {And live with them in kindness. For if you dislike them - perhaps you dislike a thing and Allaah makes therein much good.} [Quran 4:19]
Besides, divorce is not the only solution for marital problems. Your husband must avoid getting angry because anger is the reason for much evil and it is for this reason that the Prophet warned us against it. A person who is angry should avoid the effects of anger by following the sharee'ah etiquette, which we have clarified in fatwa 86681.
Allaah knows best.