Having Difficulty Finding a Wife To Marry
3-3-2020 | IslamWeb
Question:
Salam
I am a 30 year old male from New Zealand. I am finding it very hard to find someone to settle down with and marry. My parents did not approve of my hindu girlfriend I had and I have now broken up with her and back living with my parents. I feel stuck. I feel like my life is on hold because I cant find someone to settle down with and I feel really lonely. There is not a lot of muslim girls here. What do I do if I cant find a Muslim women to marry? I want my parents to be happy but I was happy with the hindu girl and it feels like there is no way we both can be happy. I always pray to Allah to help me. It has been years but I never find anyone suitable to make my parents happy. I feel like this is out of my hands and I cant do anything about it. I am feeling really depressed about this. What do I do? What actions can I take?
Answer:
All perfect praise be to Allah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allah, and that Muhammad, sallallaahu 'alayhi wa sallam, is His slave and Messenger.
First of all, we would like to thank you for your keenness to make your parents happy and to maintain your chastity through lawful means by seeking marriage; may Allah reward you generously. We ask Him to help you earn the satisfaction of your parents and bless you with a righteous wife who would be a source of comfort and happiness to you.
Indeed, you did well by resorting to supplication. We advise you to continue invoking your Lord, since it is one of the best (and most rewardable) good deeds. Verily, Allah, The Exalted, is All-Hearing and He answers the supplications; He Says (what means): {And when My servants ask you [O Muhammad] concerning Me – indeed I am near. I respond to the invocation of the supplicant when he calls upon Me. So let them respond to Me [by obedience] and believe in Me that they may be [rightly] guided.} [Quran 2:186]
Moreover, you should seek the help of your trustworthy Muslim brothers in finding a righteous Muslim wife. If you cannot find a righteous wife in your own country, you may find her in one of the neighboring countries; you should never give up nor despair. To avoid loneliness until you are blessed with marriage, you are advised to attend gatherings of goodness and seek (useful) knowledge, even online, by listening to religious lessons and lectures of scholars and keeping yourself busy with useful activities. Furthermore, fasting is one of the most effective means to suppress sexual desire. As for taking girlfriends, this is an evil act and a path to corruption. You should never do that again in the future if you seek to preserve your religiosity.
Allah Knows best.