Said to His Wife in Anger ‘I Am Not Your Husband’

28-2-2023 | IslamWeb

Question:

I was fighting with my wife and in anger, I said that don't call me by my nickname and I am not your husband as you're not treating me like one even though I had no intention of divorcing as we just had our nikkah done. have I done something wrong or is our nikkah invalid?
Answer:

All perfect praise be to Allah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allah, and that Muhammad sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam ( may Allaah exalt his mention ) is His slave and Messenger.

You may have been wrong about this reaction to your wife's behavior. The causes of anger should be avoided, and you should control yourself when it occurs; this is how the scholars explained the advice of the Prophet sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam ( may Allaah exalt his mention ) to one of his companions, by saying: “Do not get angry.”

Moreover, saying to your wife: “I'm not your husband” is one of the metaphors for divorce. Thus, divorce does not take place by a metaphor except with intention. You mentioned the meaning you meant by it, and that you did not intend to divorce, so the divorce did not take place.

Both you and your wife should strive to keep away from quarrels and their causes, and let there be respect and understanding between you, and work on everything that makes the family stable and distances it from the devil and his enticements, such as anger and the like, so that he [the devil] does not achieve his purposes, and so that there is no cause for regret.

Allah knows best.

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