Husband has no right to take compensation in exchange for divorce if harm was caused by him
15-10-2023 | IslamWeb
Question:
Asalamu alaikum wa rahmatullah. Please advise if my husband and I argue and he said whatever he said when we got married he didn't mean it. Does that affect the validity of the marriage? Also my husband abandoned me during my pregnancy and physically and verbally abused me. Even after I have the babies he still verbally abused me. He even tried to kill me. I am trying to get a divorce but I am told I need to give back the dowry. How could I give dowry to a man that I give birth to children for and he abused me through my pregnancy and after. Please advise. He will not waive the dowry
Answer:
All perfect praise be to Allah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allah, and that Muhammad, sallallaahu 'alayhi wa salla, is His slave and Messenger.
His statements should not be taken into consideration. Even if he entirely denies your marriage, his statement should not be taken into consideration as well.
If what you mentioned about him abandoning you, abusing you, and trying to kill you is true, then he is doing harm to your relationship in kindness and thus combining his disobedience to his Lord with his neglect of your right as his wife.
Requesting a divorce due to harm is permissible, but if it is possible to reconcile between you and improve the situation and stabilize the family, then that would be better as divorce most likely would have negative impact on children.
And if the situation does not get better, and you request a divorce due to the harm caused to you by him, then he has no right to take compensation in exchange for the divorce if the harm was caused by him. Sharee'ah has forbidden the husband to treat his wife with harshness and to make difficulties for her in order to take back what he gave to her. Allah the Almighty says (what means): {And do not force them to take away part of what you have given them, unless they commit a clear immorality.} [Quran 4:19]
Allah knows best.