Parents Want Him to Marry before Completing His Education

4-9-2002 | IslamWeb

Question:

I'm 20 years old and my brother is 22, he is getting married, Insha Allâh.The problem is my parents want me to get married as well, but I keep telling them that I am not ready at this time I told them that I want to educate my self further and get a job and when I am ready to marry I will do that, but every time they insist that I marry. What should I do?
Answer:

All perfect praise be to Allah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allah, and that Muhammad sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam ( may Allaah exalt his mention ) is His slave and Messenger.

The Prophet sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam ( may Allaah exalt his mention ) said: “O young people! Whoever among you can marry, should marry, because it helps him lower his gaze and guard his chastity (i.e. his private parts from committing illegal sexual intercourse etc.), and whoever is not able to marry, should fast, as fasting diminishes his sexual power.”

Shaykh Ibn Taymiyyah may Allaah have mercy upon him said: “Ability for getting married means ability to bear the expenses of the marriage.”

Islamic Sharee’ah urges every Muslim who is capable to bear the expenses of the marriage to get married. Ibn Abu Shaybah reported from Taawoos that he said to Maysarah: “You have to get married otherwise I will tell you the same statement that ‘Umar, may Allah be pleased with him, said to Abu az-Zawaa-id; he said to him: “Nothing is abstaining you from marriage except impotency or dissoluteness.” Therefore, hastening to get married is desirable for the one who is capable to do so.

If you are able to marry, or your parents are ready to bear the marriage expenses, then you should get married. As long as your parents are asking you and insisting on marrying you, then you are obliged to obey them. Obeying them in permissible matters is an obligation upon you, so obeying them in desirable matters becomes more important.

Know that after getting married it is possible for you to work and continue your studies. Moreover, marriage is among the means that open the doors of blessings.

Ibn Jareer may Allaah have mercy upon him reported that Ibn ‘Abbaas may Allaah be pleased with him said: “Allah ordained us to get married, praised marriage and ordered to marry all free and slave persons; and He promised to bestow prosperity on them for doing so.” Allah Says (what means): {If they should be poor, Allah will enrich them from His bounty, and Allah is all-Encompassing and Knowing.} [Quran 24: 32]

Ibn Jareer may Allaah have mercy upon him reported that Ibn Mas’ood may Allaah be pleased with him said: “Seek the richness and wealth in marriage.”

Allah knows best.

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