Wants to tell her father she wants to get married
15-3-2004 | IslamWeb
Question:
I am now 16 years old, almost 17, and I want to get married. How should I tell my father that I want to get married? Now he works in England and there are 2 men looking for wives and he tells my mom to look for wives for them. My mom told me about them and the next night I dreamed one of them was about to ask for my hand and then the dream just stopped. I wished it would finish the next night, but I don't believe this dream because my dreams are never true. Tell me what to do because I really want to get married.
Answer:
Praise be to Allah, the Lord of the Worlds; and may His blessings and peace be upon our Prophet Muhammad and upon all his Family and Companions.
There is no objection for the Muslim man to propose his daughter in marriage to a man he thinks is pious and good mannered. Al Bukhari reported from a Hadith narrated by Abdullah Ibn Umar (Radiya Allahu Anhu) that “Umar Ibn Al Khattab (Radiya Allahu Anhu) proposed his daughter Hafsa (Radiya Allahu Anha) to Uthman Ibn Affan (Radiya Allahu Anhu) when her husband Khunais Ibn Hudhafa Al Sahmi (Radiya Allahu Anhu) died”. Also, the pious man proposed his daughter in marriage to Prophet (Sallallahu Alaihi wa Sallam) Musa (Alaihi Salaam). Allah mentioned that Saying (interpretation of meaning): {He said: "I intend to wed one of these two daughters of mine to you,….}[28:27].
Moreover, there is no harm if the daughter tells her father that she wants to get married if any man, whose religion and character are acceptable, proposes to marry her. Al Tirmizi and Ibn Majah reported that the Prophet (Sallallahu Alaihi wa Sallam) said: "If any man whose religion and character are satisfactory, proposes to marry one of your women, marry him, otherwise there will be great mischief and corruption on earth”.
Therefore, if the two men looking for wives are of pious and good mannered, then there is no objection to your father to let you be the wife of one of them. You may do that in the way that you think is most suitable, such as talking to him over the phone or writing to him. You could also seek the advise of your mother and brothers or sisters on the best way to inform your father of your desire.
Allah knows best.