His family rejects his marital choice because of her skin condition
26-4-2005 | IslamWeb
Question:
A God-fearing Muslim with a good moral character wants to marry me and I want to marry him as well because he is a good Muslim, Masha'a Allaah. I have a skin condition (vitiligo-from which I have lost skin pigments in various parts of my body). He does not have any problems with my skin condition. He still wants to marry me. His parents are stopping him from marrying me. In light of Islam, a man does not need a Wali. But, will Allaah punish him for disobeying his parents? His parents are judging me based on a skin condition I have no control over. He thinks his parents are wrong in judging me like this and they are not considering my character at all. He wants to make sure that if he marries me, will there be any sin in disobeying his parents? His parents are threatening him that if he marries me, they will cut family relations with him completely. Please advise.
Answer:
All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad is His slave and Messenger. We ask Allaah to exalt his mention as well as that of his family and all his companions.
The children are obliged to obey their parents and be kind to them. Pleasing the parents is pleasing Allaah. Allaah says (which means): {And your Lord has decreed that you worship none but Him. And that you be dutiful to your parents…}[Quran 17:23]. Moreover, the Prophet 
said: "The pleasure of Allaah is attained by pleasing parents, and the wrath of Allaah is ensued by angering parents." [At-Tirmithi]
Therefore, if this man is religious and has a good moral character as you have stated in your question and he wishes to get married to you, then he has to endeavour to convince his parents to agree to this marriage. Besides, he has to supplicate Allaah as much as possible and seek the help of righteous and pious people who might succeed in convincing his parents. It might be that they would agree and therefore he would have achieved their pleasure and his will in marrying you. However, if his parents still refuse, then he has to obey them, because he is obliged to obey them but he is not obliged to marry you. Allaah may bless you with a husband better than him. Allaah says (which means): {… and it may be that you dislike a thing which is good for you and that you like a thing which is bad for you. Allaah knows but you do not know.}[Quran 2:216].
Allaah knows best.