Wants to convince her husband that she can not have friends due to her autism
4-4-2006 | IslamWeb
Question:
I am an American Muslimah married to an Egyptian. I recently told him I have a form of autism, yet he does not believe me. I am really hurt. I am afraid that because he comes from another culture he does not understand. He says that my shyness is a choice and I could make friends if I really wanted to. I know shyness is a virtue, but I really cannot socialize because of my autism. Am I committing a sin in not having any friends? Should I convince my husband that autism is a real disease or should I just drop that matter to avoid martial strife? I feel I really need understanding but I cannot get it because I have no one to talk to about this matter besides my husband and he does not believe me. May Allah bless you and I thank you for your response.
Answer:
All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad is His slave and Messenger. We ask Allaah to exalt his mention as well as that of his family and all his companions.
A person is not sinful for not taking friends or socializing with people, but he may need to keep company with righteous people. Your loneliness, which you described, may lead to unpleasant psychological consequences. So, you should try to convince your husband in a good and nice manner so that he would understand the matter and then he would help you in treating it.
The following is some beneficial advice:
1) Invoking Allaah earnestly to cure you from this disease. Allaah Says (what means): {Is not He (better than your gods) Who responds to the distressed one, when he calls Him, and Who removes the evil, and makes you inheritors of the earth, generations after generations. Is there any Ilaah (god) with Allaah?'} [Quran 27:62].
2) Performing obligations and acts of obedience, like prayers, fasting, wearing Hijab, performing supererogatory acts of worship like mentioning Allaah (especially the legislated mention of Allaah in the morning and evening) and reciting the Quran, and other supererogatory acts.
3) Performing Ruqyah more than once by reciting the Quran, legislated mention of Allaah and supplications. There is no harm for a righteous woman to perform Ruqyah on you, but you should not go to fortune-tellers, magicians or soothsayers. In this regard please refer to Fatwa 88705.
4) Writing to the advisory service of Islamweb, so that your case will be studied by specialized people and they would describe the appropriate treatment.
Allaah Knows best.