Get past the fast: the real reason for Ramadan rebellion

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As parents, we often worry about our children, and we want the very best for them—in this life and most importantly, we want the best for them in the Hereafter. We wonder if they will end up making the right decisions, if they will choose to fast in Ramadan and act on their good intentions and avoid sins.

We supplicate that they will truly observe the rites of Ramadan each year—not by just the exterior by forgoing food and drink—but genuinely seek to find the core meaning of getting the most benefits of this blessed month. We yearn for them to take into account the multitude of blessings in their lives and for their sins to be forgiven for their sincerity.
 
But we also worry if they are sincere; with so many distractions in our lives, parents are longing to find ways to ensure that their youngsters stay focused on the priority of Ramadan. We want new ways to motivate our youth to commence the fast ...or new methods to encourage an enthusiastic attitude about fasting year after year.
 
Al-Jumuah magazine surveyed a group of our youth to find out more about: fasting, faith and their feelings on the topic of Ramadan.
 
We asked about:
Their level of faith in Allah. If they performed the 5 daily prayers. If they fasted in Ramadan and why they choose to do so. If they knew other Muslims who did not fast and how they felt about it. If they have ever felt embarrassed about fasting.
And finally, we asked if their family fasted and how they felt about it.
 
First, Mashaallaah, it was very interesting to find out how open and honest kids can be when they have the opportunity to voice their opinions freely, and anonymously.
 
Our survey also brought more awareness about what their priorities are and the reasons why young people choose to fast–or not to fast– in Ramadan.
 
Allahu Akbar, most kids told us they fast solely for the Sake of Allah.
 
Abu Sa'eed Al-Khudri may Allah be pleased with him reported the Messenger of Allah as saying: "Every slave of Allah who observes fast for a day in the way of Allah, Allah would remove, because of this day, his face farther from the Hellfire a travel distance of seventy years." [Muslim]
 
Only four out of nearly 50 children surveyed did not make their 5 daily prayers.
 
The majority of kids stated they held a fair to strong faith in Allah. But surprisingly, even the youngsters who said they had a weak faith admitted that they chose to fast each Ramadan.
 
In fact, each of our youth surveyed said they fast. But the majority of them also stated that they knew Muslim youths who do not fast.
 
When asked about how they felt about it, most replied that it confused them or it was because they were worried about not looking 'cool' in front of others — especially if they attended a public school.
 
"When I was younger, I thought my friends (at public school) would make fun of me".
 
That quote was from one young lady who took our survey. By the way, peer pressure in a public school environment was the # 1 reason cited for not performing prayers and fasting.
 
One youth said (about other Muslim youths that do not fast), "I feel really sorry for them, because they don't recognize the beauty of the act (of fasting)."
 
Finally, one youth said sadly: "It makes me feel like nobody cares for their religion anymore."
 
Most surveyed agreed that it was mainly a combination of lack of awareness and education about the obligations of Islam and their home environment.
 
While some youth saw fasting as an opportunity for Da'wah.
"My family members are not all Muslim, so I use fasting as a means of Da'wah." "Fasting is an obvious way for one to tell the world about Islam."
Now here is the caveat, where the solution comes into play—and this is the good news.
Upon studying the results of our survey, we found a constant reoccurring theme; an outline of what truly motivates a young person to perform prayers, to fast and to hold tight to their belief system.
You just may be surprised as to what that invariable foundation is.
It can be summed up in a single word: family.
Family was found to be the single most important factor in each survey.
Ever heard that old saying: "A family that prays together stays together"?
Well, take heed, because it is so true—even from the mouths of babes.
Some kids cited their parents as one of the reasons why they fast; others wrote freely about the pride they have in the fact that their family fasts.
 "I am very proud of my family (because they fast) and my community motivates me."  "I feel proud that my family fasts."
Families that practice their religion together as a daily part of their life are clearly making a difference in the lives of their children.
 
Keep in mind, many kids surveyed said they knew others who did not fast.
 
But also keep in mind, all kids surveyed were attending an Islamic convention, meaning their parents are involved and keeping their children in Islamic environments, which provide solid support systems.
 
Allah is our Protector, but He clearly gave us each a role to play.
 
Our role in our family—as a mother or father—provides the foundation of our children's faith; without our daily example and the additional guidance of our friends, family and our community, our children are at a loss.
 
So, what can you do to motivate your kids to fast and become more enthusiastic about the holiest month of the year?
 
Teach by example everyday.
To conclude, I will leave you with a quote from our youth: "Al-Hamdulillaah, it (fasting as a family) makes me feel like we are on the right track".
 
No one could have said it any better.

 

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