Indeed, homes are not [judged according to their] cement walls or construction. Rather, homes are judged according to the people who inhabit them. Were the inhabitants of a home to be righteous people, they would be filled with the light [of their righteous deeds]. Likewise, were the residents of the home to be evil and dissolute, the home would be filled with darkness. A Muslim home has certain features and attributes:
They are righteous believing Muslims who perform the prescribed prayers.
The members of a Muslim home believe in Allah The Exalted, His promise, and warning. They hope for His Mercy and fear His Punishment; they adhere to performing their prayers at their due times and are not inattentive or heedless when performing them since Allah The Exalted Says (what means): {So woe to those who pray*[But] who are heedless of their prayer …} [Quran 107:4-5]
Knowledgeable scholars say, “Those who are meant in that verse are those who delay performing the due prayers. Allah The Almighty underlines His stern warning to such people.” The inhabitants of a Muslim home fulfill the rights of Allah The Almighty and those [rights] of His slaves. They fulfill the rights of Allah The Exalted, perform due prayers, adhere to the obligatory fast, offer Zakah (obligatory almsgiving), perform Hajj, are dutiful to their parents, maintain their kinship ties, treat their neighbors kindly and leniently, and adopt high morals and refined manners. They also fulfill the rights of the people; they do not do injustice to others, and do not curse or harm others since they fear Allah The Almighty Who Says (what means): {And those who harm believing men and believing women for [something] other than what they have earned have certainly born upon themselves a slander and manifest sin.} [Quran 33:58]
Attributes of the Members of a Muslim Home – II
They safeguard their body from committing sins and vices.
The members of a Muslim home shield their tongues against all that is forbidden. Indeed, guarding one’s tongue against committing sins is a critical and vital issue in Islam; Allah The Exalted Says (what means): {Certainly will the believers have succeeded:* They who are during their prayer humbly submissive* And they who turn away from ill speech…} [Quran 23:1-3]
Allah The Exalted describes His slaves in the verse that says (what means): {And [they are] those who do not testify to falsehood, and when they pass near ill speech, they pass by with dignity.} [Quran 25:72]
The servants of the most Merciful are those who safeguard their tongues from uttering falsehood, ill speech, and lies. How could they not do so, knowing that the Prophet, , told Mu‘aath, may Allah be pleased with him: “Shall I tell you of that which holds together all of these things?[SZ1] ” Mu‘aath, may Allah be pleased with him, said, “Yes, O Prophet of Allah.” He, , took hold of Mu‘aath’s tongue and said: “Exercise restraint on this.” Mu’aath, may Allah be pleased with him, enquired, “O Messenger of Allah, will we be held accountable for what we say?” Thereupon, the Prophet, , said: “Will anything else besides (irresponsible) talk cause the people to be thrown in Hell-Fire upon their faces?” [At-Tirmithi][SZ2]
They guard their private parts.
Allah The Exalted Says (what means): {Tell the believing men to reduce [some] of their vision and guard their private parts. That is purer for them. Indeed, Allah is Acquainted with what they do.* And tell the believing women to reduce [some] of their vision and guard their private parts and not expose their adornment except that which [necessarily] appears thereof and to wrap [a portion of] their head-covers over their chests and not expose their adornment except to their husbands, their fathers, their husbands’ fathers, their sons, their husbands’ sons, their brothers, their brothers’ sons, their sisters’ sons, their women, that which their right hands possess, or those male attendants having no physical desire, or children who are not yet aware of the private aspects of women. And let them not stamp their feet to make known what they conceal of their adornment. And turn to Allah in repentance, all of you, O believers, that you might succeed.} [Quran 24:30-31]
Allah The Almighty depicted them as such in the noble Quran as He Says (what means): {And they who guard their private parts* Except from their wives or those their right hands possess, for indeed, they will not be blamed –* But whoever seeks beyond that, then those are the transgressors} [Quran 23:5-7]
The Prophet, , clarified that the ultimate aim of the devil is to ruin Muslim homes; he said: “Iblees (Satan) places his throne upon water; he then sends detachments (for creating dissension and sowing the seeds of discord among people); the nearer to him in rank are those who are most notorious in creating dissension. One of them comes and says, 'I did so and so'. And he says, 'You have done nothing'. Then one amongst them comes and says, 'I did not spare so and so until I sowed the seed of discord between him and his wife.' Satan tells him to come near and says, 'You have done well'.” Al-A‘mash said, ‘I think the Prophet then added: “He then embraces him.” [Muslim]
The devil is determined to destroy the Muslim family knowing the great havoc that is wrought by ruining Muslim families. Therefore, the devil is determined to sow the seeds of discord between married couples and between brothers and among all family members.
Another characteristic of the inhabitants of a Muslim home is cooperation in doing righteous deeds and obeying Allah The Exalted so as to implement the Command of Allah The Almighty as He Says (what means): {And cooperate in righteousness and piety, but do not cooperate in sin and aggression...}[Quran 5:2]
It was narrated on the authority of Abu Hurayrah, may Allah be pleased with him, that the Prophet, , said: “May Allah The Almighty have mercy upon a man who gets up during the night to pray and wakes up his wife and who, if she refuses to get up, sprinkles water on her face. And may Allah The Almighty have mercy upon the woman who gets up during the night to pray and wakes up her husband and who, if he refuses, sprinkles water on his face.” [Ibn Hibbaan [Saheeh]
Indeed, this is cooperation and mutual aid in obeying Allah The Exalted [that should be found between married couples]. How great it is to find in your home someone who would help you obey Allah The Exalted duly and this is what pious Muslims supplicate Allah The Exalted for! Allah The Exalted Says (what means): {And those who say, “Our Lord, grant us from among our wives and offspring comfort to our eyes and make us an example for the righteous.} [Quran 25:74]
The comfort to the eye among spouses and children are those who would help and encourage you to obey Allah The Almighty. As for those [among one’s spouses and children] who would drive you to commit sins, they are tests and trials that were set by Allah The Almighty. May Allah The Exalted protect us [from such evil].