c- Instilling the principles of mercy, love, generosity, altruism, chivalry, and sympathy among family members, relatives and society. You should develop a sense of responsibility, social solidarity and team work among them, so they can help the needy, collect charity, food and clothing and participate in relieving the wounded and sick people during times of calamities.
In a Hadeeth (narration) on the authority of Anas, may Allah be pleased with him, he said that the Messenger of Allah, said: “Indeed, there are people who are keys of good and locks of evil; and certainly there are people who are keys of evil and locks of good. Glad tidings are for those whom Allah has enabled [to be] the keys of good [and facilitated] good through them; and doomed are those whom evil is facilitated through them.” [Saheeh]
People who are keys to evil and locks of good are the source of all temptations, being undutiful to parents, severance of the ties of kinship, breaking up of social bonds, weakening of the social fabric, corruption, sins, wars and ordeals, because they suffer from some dangerous diseases in their hearts and the contagion of their diseases spread. We supplicate Allah The Almighty to save us from them. Beware of such ailments that comprise:
- Having weak faith in Allah The Almighty and the Last Day.
- Taking the Divine commands and the injunctions of Sharee‘ah lightly.
- Forgetting that angels register sayings and deeds. Allah The Almighty Says (what means): {And everything they did is in written records. And every small and great [thing] is inscribed.} [Quran 52:52-53]
- Forgetting death and its agonies, and the bliss and torment of the grave.
- Seeking the short-lived pleasures of the world, and deeming Paradise and its bliss and Hell and its torment as insignificant. Allah The Almighty Says (what means): {So as for he who transgressed and preferred the life of the world, then indeed, Hellfire will be [his] refuge. But as for he who feared the position of his Lord and prevented the soul from [unlawful] inclination, then indeed, Paradise will be [his] refuge.} [Quran 79:37-41]
- Showing impatience and weak will because of weakness of character induced by vices of arrogance, grudge, envy, jealousy and selfishness. People who have such characteristics do not enjoy peace of mind themselves and cannot bear to leave others to enjoy it. They are the doors to all temptations and evil. We seek refuge in Allah The Almighty from them.
Allah The Almighty Says (what means): {And who is better in speech than one who invites to Allah and does righteousness and says, “Indeed, I am of the Muslims.” And not equal are the good deed and the bad. Repel [evil] by that [deed] which is better; and thereupon the one whom between you and him is enmity [will become] as though he was a devoted friend. But none is granted it except those who are patient, and none is granted it except one having a great portion [of good]. And if there comes to you from Satan an evil suggestion, then seek refuge in Allah. Indeed, He is The Hearing, The Knowing.} [Quran 41:23-26]
d- It is great to be a good companion to your husband. In this regard, it is advisable to consider matters duly, weigh your priorities as instructed by Divine guidance. To that end, you should live kindly with your husband, take lessons from the stories of the early and late generations, advise your husband and have mutual understanding with him about bringing up the children, dealing with your families and addressing family problems after due deliberation. This will keep the family strong and cohesive.
The Messenger of Allah, , said: “The best of your women is the affectionate, the fertile, the obedient and the consoling, if they fear Allah. The most evil of your women are those who do not adhere to Hijab and those who swagger, and these are the hypocrites. only a few of them(i.e., women in general) will enter Paradise.” [Saheeh]
Help your husband and children and support them in maintaining their honor and dignity and whatever elevates them and is beneficial to Islam. Encourage them to adhere to Islam, invite others to it and to have patience with that seeking to obey Allah The Almighty and seeking His Pleasure.
Many women – may Allah guide them – only care about themselves and are concerned for nothing but the worldly life. So, beware, sister, of hindering the path of goodness and of averting others from the path of Allah The Almighty. The Mothers of the Believers, may Allah be pleased with them all, should be role models for us to follow.
Khadeejah, may Allah be pleased with her, was the best woman and she was the first person to believe in the Messenger of Allah, . When the Prophet, , was commanded by Allah The Almighty to convey the message and the Divine revelation started to come to him, Khadeejah, may Allah be pleased with her, supported him financially and spiritually. When the Prophet, recounted to her his experience with the revelation, she calmed him down and sai, “By Allah, Allah will never let you down, for you maintain kinship ties, help the weak, entertain your guests and help out those who are stricken with calamity.” [Al-Bukhari and Muslim]
Serious trials have afflicted the Muslims and have stormed each of their families, including the trial of doubts, desires, bad company, unrighteous leaders, deviant sects, wealth, Riba-based banks, and impious husbands, children, and women. Be mindful of Allah The Almighty, lest you get embroiled in these trials. Do not cause temptations or instigate them. In a Hadeeth on the authority of Usaamah ibn Zayd and Sa‘eed ibn Zayd ibn ‘Amr ibn Nufayl, may Allah be pleased with them, they said that the Prophet, , said: “I have not left behind me any temptation that is more harmful to men than women.”[Al-Bukhari and Muslim]