I began the divorce from my unhappy wife by saying that I divorced her. She said that she wants to leave the house for her iddah period as she is sure that she is not pregnant so that she can become more independent. She also said that she will go to the food bank instead of eating from my food. After that, she expects to come back and take our five kids. I have tried to (calmly!) remind her that I want to help her adjust and that the three cycle period is a requirement, as is my providing for her.
What rights do I have in this situation? Do I have to give the kids to her when/if she decides to return for them?

All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad is His slave and Messenger.

If a woman is in her waiting period from a revocable divorce, she is not permitted to go out of her husband’s home until the expiry of her waiting period as Allaah Says (what means): {…do not turn them out of their [husbands’] houses, nor should they [themselves] leave [during that period]…}[Quran 65:1] For more benefit, please refer to Fatwa 82478.

This ruling is not peculiar to a pregnant wife only, but it applies to all other wives. However, if a wife is pregnant, her waiting period is until she gives birth. 

 A divorced woman who is revocably divorced has the right that her husband should spend on her as long as she is in her waiting period and we previously clarified the rights of a divorced wife in Fatwa 83934.

However, she may renounce her right of being maintained or any other right, but she should have witnesses to this effect so that this matter will not cause problems in the future.

Since you had divorced her, then you have no rights on her, but if you refer to fostering the children, then in case your wife is a non-Muslim or a dissolute person, she has no right to foster the children. However, if she is a Muslim and she is eligible to foster them, she has the right to foster them as long as she does not remarry or that there is no impediment that prevents her from the fostering, in which case the fostering moves to the one who deserves the fostering more after her. 

For more benefit on the people who are more deserving of fostering the children, please refer to Fatwa 84618.

If this woman is religious and has a good moral conduct, then we advise you to take her back because divorce has devastating effects in general especially on the children.

As regards happiness in marital life, then one may achieve it after it did not exist at all, and this can be attained by each spouse fulfilling his duties towards the other, in addition to the existence of children who are the best reason for happiness.

For more benefit on the rights of the spouses towards each other, please refer to Fataawa 85308 and 83157.

Allaah Knows best.