ASA. Dear brothers I am going to start my question with all directness. I always have been a good muslim. I will never say perfect as we all make mistakes but i fast, pray read The Holy Quran and remember to do Zikr. My husband when I met him 2 yrs ago was not religious at all but now alhumdulillah he prays and has developed a very strong faith. Now my problem is he is becoming extreme. He has completely changed and I am afraid to say this but its for the worse. We both have short tempers but he makes sure he says something to aggrevate me which lead to me losing my temper. He has started to abuse me brings my family in my past in and moreover calls me a bad muslim. he has hit me and brings in random hadeeths and forces me to follow them...he has started to make me feel suffocated. I was born here and my mother did a very good job in bringing me up. I know whats right and wrong but he insists he is right and i follow each and every hadeeth he says. I like to be with him even after we have intercourse and he use to enjoy it but now he is changing he pushes me away and says its haram to see him like this and says he doesnt wish for me to see him like this. he is changing and this is forcing me to hate him and his extremism is pushing me away from Allah.

All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad iaas His slave and Messenger.

First of all, may Allaah reward you for being keen on staying steadfast on the right path, and we ask Him to increase your guidance and piety and rectify your husband.

As regard, your husband provoking you, mistreating you, beating you and doing the other things that you mentioned in the question about him, then he is negligent about your right as a wife and he is having bad marital relationship with you and contradicting the statement of Allaah (which means): {And live with them in kindness.}[Quran 4:19] For more benefit, please refer to Fatwa 150843.

Hence, we first of all, advise you to be patient with him, as there is good in being patient, Allaah willing; for more benefit on the excellence of patience, please refer to Fatwa 85445 and 83577.

Secondly, we advise you to earnestly ask Allaah as much as possible to guide him to the right course and the truth as Allaah Says (what means): {And when My servants ask you, [O Muhammad], concerning Me - indeed - I am near. I respond to the invocation of the supplicant when he calls upon Me. So let them respond to Me [by obedience] and believe in Me that they may be [rightly] guided.} [Quran 2:186] For more benefit on the etiquettes of supplication, please refer to Fataawa 88296 and 83421.

Also, you should try to find out the reason for this change and for this conduct. If you are the cause, you should endeavor to solve it, and if you behaved in a certain manner and he misunderstood you, then you should clarify the matter to him.

However, if there is no apparent reason on your part but it was a result of your husband's bad understanding of religion and religiousness, as it may happen from some people when they start to become religious, then the solution for this matter is the correct knowledge and the proper understanding of the Sharee’ah. This can be achieved by taking every matter of the religion from the scholars who are moderate and balanced. So, you should try to urge your husband to follow this path and he should ask the scholars as the cure for ignorance is asking.

As regards your husband obliging you to act upon every Hadeeth that he tells you, then this is very strange. A husband has no right to ask his wife to act according to the meaning of every Prophetic Hadeeth especially if the Hadeeth is about desirable matters; rather, some jurists are of the view that the husband has no right to discipline his wife regarding her obligations towards Allaah. Rather, the best method in this regard is that your husband encourages you to abide by these texts but not to force you to do so.

On the other hand, if your husband does not wish that you be next to him after having sexual intercourse with you, then you should not make this a reason for dispute between you and him. For more benefit, please refer to Fatwa 82530.

Furthermore, it should be mentioned that you should avoid getting angry, as anger leads to so many evils; it is for this reason that the Prophet warned us against getting angry as he said to the one who sought advise from him: ''Do not get angry.”, and he repeated this many times. [Al-Bukhari] For more benefit on the treatment of anger, please refer to Fatwa 88764.

Finally, if dissension continues between both of you, then we advise you to reconcile with him and appoint rational people to judge between you; Allaah Says (what means): {And if a woman fears from her husband contempt or evasion, there it no sin upon them if they make terms of settlement between them — and settlement is best.} [Quran 4:128]

Allaah Knows best.