As Salaam Alaikum, my husband is looking for a 2nd wife. I know this is his right as per the sunnah. He is using matrimonial sites that have pictures of women, and allow for chatting and exchanging info between men and women with out her wakil being involved. I believe him when he says he doesnt chat with the sisters, but I dont like that he feels its ok to correspond directly with the sisters. He says, its ok because he is sincere in seeking marriage, and how else can he know if they are compatible. My question is, is he wrong for using this method? And how am I as his wife, supposed to deal with him doing this?

All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, is His Slave and Messenger.

We have previously clarified that there is no harm to seek marriage via the Internet, if the sites which provide such service comply with the Sharee‘ah criteria. For further information, please refer to Fatwa 88610.

On the other hand, it is permissible for a man to chat with a non-Mahram woman, if there is a need for that, on condition that it should be only in case of need, and the Sharee‘ah etiquettes in this respect are observed.

Besides, it is not requisite that the guardian should know that the woman under his guardianship is looking for a husband. But if a man wishes to marry her, he has to seek the permission of her guardian.

Unless the Sharee‘ah criteria and etiquettes are observed in the process of looking for a spouse via the Internet, undoubtedly, it will be very dangerous, and it may lead to temptation and to what is forbidden by Allaah. Hence, in the Fatwa referred to, we have mentioned that this is not the most proper way to look for a wife; and to do this through the reliable trustworthy family members and friends is better and more hopeful to ensure safe consequences.

Finally, it should be noted that the good intention never makes good the bad deed. Therefore, the true intention of a man in looking for a wife does not make it acceptable for him to violate the Sharee‘ah rulings. So, if you know that your husband violates Sharee‘ah in this respect, you should advise him in a soft and gentle manner, remind him of Allaah The Almighty, and frighten him of His painful punishment.

Allaah Knows best.