I have asked to my wife that if u will attend the marriage of her cousion than it will be deviroce from mine side and i have written it through SMS but my wife didnot read the sms or she is saying that sms has not been received to him we both live in different cities.My wife visited the home of his cousion without informning me that i will be angry and might be give him divorce. My wife visited the home of her cousion but the marriage function was in the marriage hall and she didnot participate in the marriage ceremony that was in the hall much more far away from her cousins house.My wife doesnot participate in any wedding function. Iam so much tense regarding this because this is last chance for me. Further last time we also qurell and some ULMA say that divorce was effective and some say that divorce was not effective. If previous one was effective than 2 mistakes has been done apart from the above mentioned mistake. Please help me in my both issues. Guide me in best possible way.

All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad is His slave and Messenger.

If the wording that you mentioned is just a warning and a threat of divorce meaning that you will divorce your wife if she disobeys you, then divorce does not take place just because she went there unless you initiated divorce, the thing that you should not do.

However, even if you explicitly conditioned divorce like if you had said to your wife ‘you are divorced if you attend the marriage ceremony’, then divorce does not take place as she did not attend the marriage ceremony upon which you conditioned her divorce as you mentioned.

In any case, what should be taken into account in breaking your word and whether or not divorce takes place accordingly is your intention regarding your wife's attendance: did you intend her attendance of the marriage ceremony or her visit to the house of her cousin? Al-Mardaawi said: “If she [the wife] goes out in a manner that differs from that which he [the husband] intended, then he is not breaking his oath.”

Allaah Knows best.