1)If a man says to his wife: "If you do not want to be with me, then you can divorce me, I do not intend to divorce you" And then the woman says, "you can be sure that I take from you a divorce" But they both thought that it was all the same to what she says it does not matter because the woman can not take a divorce. Neither of them did not know that a man can give a woman the right to divorce . So, this woman did not mean that she now divorce from her husband, because she did not ask for a khul . Her words were threats that she intends to divorce in the future.What is ruling? 2) And another question ..If a man says to his wife, I divorce you . But he means in the future . and both understand that he means it in the future. What is ruling?

All perfect praise be to Allah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad is His slave and Messenger.

These words that were exchanged between that husband and his wife do not lead to divorce as long as they did not intend divorce by saying them. Qalyoobi said in his Haashiyah: "Among the cases of giving the wife authority to divorce herself is the clear word of divorce if it is attributed to other than its proper person; like if he (a husband) said to his wife: ‘divorce me’ or ‘I am divorced from you’, and she said ‘I divorce you’, then if he had intended to give her authority to divorce herself and she intended divorce, divorce is effective, otherwise it is not."

Besides, if a man says to his wife ‘I divorce you’ intending divorce in the future, then this does not lead to divorce as it is like a promise (of divorce); Shaykh Ibn ‘Uhtaymeen said in his book Ash-Sharh Al-Mumti' a'la Zaad Al-Mustaqni': “His (Al-Hajjaawi's) statement (about uttering divorce) 'in the present tense' like saying ‘you are being divorced’ does not lead to divorce as it is a report which indicates that she will be divorced (in the future), while divorce is in the hands of the husband. But if the husband intended the present (i.e. initiating divorce on the spot), then she is divorced as the present tense (in the Arabic language) could refer to both the present and the future.”

For more benefit on the fact that uttering divorce in the present tense is a promise of divorce and it is not effective unless the husband intends divorce on the spot, please refer to Fataawa 92476 and 156933.

Allah Knows best.