Assalam o Alaikum I am in a troubled marriage. my husband and inlaws have harmed my image and gave me pain emotionally and mentally. i have a baby now and ant leave. i would like to know whjat should a wife do when husband doesnt want to live with her threaten her daily about divorce and make her angry and record her and pass it on to people and make the outer world feel the wife is wrong . not knowing that he is harming her. my husband feels since he has the permission to take another wife he can harm me and abuse me . he helps his mother in harming me .i am v confused. my sister in law has two mentally retarded children and they all feel its my responsibility to look after the kids. i had refused initially to not to look after them now for two years they have driven me crazy. they want to take child away from me ,made my husband utter the divorce word. and made him hit me and what not. they wanted to get attack my honor so i can fully be under their control. sheikh i am v hurt and i cannot take it. i am stuck for the rest of my life here.

All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad is His Slave and Messenger.

In the Islamic Sharee’ah, the husband is commanded to treat his wife kindly and satisfy her rights over him. Please refer to Fataawa 86618 and 88304. He is also obliged to protect her against any harm from his family, not to help them harm her. Rather, he should remind them of the Islamically-required good relationship between the in-laws and that his wife is not only the wife of their son but also the mother of their grandchild.

Additionally, the wife is not obliged to serve the family of her husband unless she does that out of her own will as we have clarified in Fatwa 84909. Also, the wife has a right over her husband to provide her a separate house and she is not obliged to live with his relatives. For more benefit, please refer to Fatwa 84608.

Therefore, we advise both of you to reconcile differences and seek the help of righteous people from each of your families to reconcile any differences you have. They should advise everyone to fear Allaah concerning themselves and others. If the problem is solved, then praise to Allaah; but if the situation continues as it is, then the wife is not required to be in such tension and live in such distress. She should ask her husband for divorce even in return for compensation which she pays to him. However, it should be noted that if it is the husband who harms his wife, he is not permitted to take a compensation for granting her divorce. For more benefit, please refer to Fatwa 89039 and 83250.

If divorce takes place, the wife has the right to custody of the child until she remarries, in which case, custody is transferred to the female who is more deserving of custody after her according to the sequence clarified by the jurists, which we have clarified in Fatwa 84618.

Finally, we have to comment on your statement “they made my husband utter the divorce”; if he has pronounced the word 'divorce', then the divorce is effective, and if he had sexual intercourse with you after that and the divorce is revocable, then having sexual intercourse with the wife (during her waiting period) is considered as taking the wife back to the marriage bond according to the view of some scholars. For more benefit, kindly refer to Fataawa 89845 and 82541.

Allaah Knows best.