Assalam aleikoum I did something stupid. Ik had 6 mobile phones, very cheap bought online. So I was texting from several phones tot the mobile I was using at the time. The messages which I sent to my self from the other phones and which I sent from the other phones implied that I was committing adultery. Quitte stupid, I did not mean any harm and I meant to delete them, but I had forgotten all about it. Let's make it clear I did not commit adultery. So one day I had a problem with my phone and the daughter of my best friend (female) said that she might solve the problem. She took the to her mother(I was upstairs reading my mail) and instead of solving the problem they read my text messages. then my female friend told her husband and my daughter, so my daughter does not want to have anything to do with me. My female friend never talkes to me about it, but just started to treat me badly. So I have 2 questions: 1. Who is the biggest wrongdoer and how much am I at fault? 2. What is the best way to solve this problem so that my daughter knows that these are bad lies?

All perfect praise be to Allah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allah, and that Muhammad is His Slave and Messenger.

Undoubtedly, you have wronged yourself when you wrote these text messages that were made up of lies about you sinning. In fact, claiming that you had committed adultery, aside from being a lie, may be a reason for luring you into actually committing that sin, or luring others to commit that sin with you or with other women, or at least causing anyone who reads those messages to suspect you, which is what happened. Therefore, it is incumbent on you to turn to Allaah in sincere repentance and beware of doing that again in the future. Please, refer to Fatwa 86527 about the conditions of the repentance.

As for your friend and her daughter, if they had read the messages on your mobile phone without your permission, then they have wronged you by that. Moreover, if your friend informed her husband and your daughter of the content of these messages, then this is another way in which she wronged you. They both should turn to Allaah in repentance. They should have verified the matter and made sure whether these accusations were true instead of making negative assumptions about you. Allaah, The Exalted, commanded us to investigate matters and look for evidence before believing any reports and news; Allaah, The Exalted, says (what means): {O you who have believed, if there comes to you a disobedient one with information, investigate, lest you harm a people out of ignorance and become, over what you have done, regretful.}[Quran 49:6] He also forbade having bad assumptions about people; Allaah, The Exalted, says (what means): {O you who have believed, avoid much [negative] assumption. Indeed, some assumption is sin. ...}[Quran 49:12]

On the other hand, your daughter does not have the right to do something that harms you in any way; even if you had actually committed adultery, let alone when the matter is only a lie! It is incumbent on children to be kind and dutiful towards their parents even if the parents committed religious violations or offence as clarified in Fataawa 87019 and 89078.

Dear sister, one of the best ways to treat this situation is to turn to Allaah in earnest supplication and appeal to Him to relieve your hardship and grant you a way out of your problem. Allaah, The Exalted, says (what means): {Is He [not best] who responds to the desperate one when he calls upon Him and removes evil and makes you inheritors of the earth? Is there a deity with Allaah? Little do you remember.}[Quran 27:62] We advise you to recite the reported supplication that the Prophet used to recite whenever distress befell him. Abu Bakrah narrated that the Prophet said: "The supplications to be said by one who is distressed are: 'Allaahumma rahmataka arju falaa takilni 'ilaa nafsi tarfat ‘ayn, aslih li sha'ni kullah; laa ilaaha illaa anta (which means: O Allaah! Your mercy is what I hope for; do not abandon me to myself for an instant, but put all my affairs in good order for me. None is worthy of worship but You).'" [Abu Daawood]

Moreover, you should confront whoever knew of the content of these messages and inform them of the truth. We ask Allaah to safeguard us all from erring and to help us avoid all evil words and deeds.

Allaah knows best.