I converted to Islam two years ago and married a Muslim man. As I am a Westerner and have previously been divorced, my husband said that this would be unacceptable to his family and that the marriage must be a secret as his family would disown him. We did not marry in a mosque but we had a contract, I had no guardian (wali) for the marriage, and we had two non-Muslim witnesses who were sworn to secrecy about the marriage. There was no announcement and the marriage had to be kept secret from my husband's family. I did tell my family about it, and when they found out, they disowned me as it was unacceptable for me to marry a Muslim in their eyes. I do not live with my husband. It is possible to live together but he gives many excuses. It is very lonely to not live with my husband and for the marriage to be a secret and for me to have been disowned by my family. My question is whether the original marriage was valid as I had no wali and it was a secret and the witnesses were non-Muslims? I want to separate from him to enable us to sort out our issues and then come back together properly and live together and have a proper companionship. I think that our first marriage was invalid. My husband says that he was ignorant of the rules of a valid marriage and that ignorance means that the marriage is still valid. Can you clarify this for us please?

All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah and that Muhammad is His slave and Messenger.

Firstly, we would like to congratulate you for your reversion to Islam; verily, this is such a great blessing and a reason for attaining happiness in this worldly life and the Hereafter, Allaah willing. We implore Allaah, The Exalted, to bless you with steadfastness in holding on to the true religion unto the Day of Judgment. We advise you to seek beneficial knowledge and to keep the company of righteous women.

You should know that such a marriage conducted in the absence of the bride’s wali and with two non-Muslim witnesses is defective (faasid). The presence of the bride’s wali is one of the conditions for the validity of the marriage contract in Islam according to the preponderant opinion of scholars; please refer to fatwa 83629. Moreover, it is invalid to have a non-Muslim as a witness to a marriage contract of a Muslim, as underlined in fatwa 85791. Ignorance of the relevant religious ruling may be a valid excuse for relieving the doer from the burden of sin; however, it does not render the marriage contract valid. The termination of a defective marriage is done either through legal termination of the marriage contract or a divorce issued by the husband, as highlighted in fatwa 243013.

If you wish to retain your marriage, you should renew the marriage contract (i.e. conduct a new marriage contract) in the correct way, bearing in mind that a non-Muslim cannot be a Muslim bride’s wali. Please refer to fatwa 88488 about those who can act as the bride’s wali in the marriage contract.

It should be noted that a marriage is valid as long as all the conditions for its validity are fulfilled, even if it was not announced. Such a marriage is not considered a secret marriage because the announcement of marriage is only recommended and not obligatory.

We hope that you would not worry about your family’s reaction and disowning you because of your marriage to a Muslim man because their objection is groundless because of it being contrary to the sharee'ah; verily, the Truth is more deserving of being followed. Moreover, if a woman is a new revert to Islam, holds a different nationality, and has been previously married, then none of these are valid excuses not to marry her.

Allaah knows best.