Her husband is too busy in Da'wah to give her time
Fatwa No: 90603

Question

I have a question regarding my husband he is Imaam and he is very busy he gives all his time to the people for helping them understanding Islam but when he comes back home he becomes another person very tired, doesn't like to talk, this behavior hurts me a lot as wife but he doesn't feel that I am a human being. I understand him and I forgive him but this is the first time that I regret why I get married to somebody I could win his friendship, in any time I can ask him and he can answer me without being sad or mad. Just I like to tell you he is very good as a person and I love him so much, I don't know what can I do and what decision I will take.

Answer

All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad is His slave and Messenger. We ask Allaah to exalt his mention as well as that of his family and all his companions.

First of all, we advise this brother, who calls other people to Islam, to balance between the right of others in Da'wah (calling to Allaah) and the right of his wife, children and other relatives who have a right on him. That is because Allaah ordained us to be just and to give everyone his right. Allaah Says (which means): {Indeed, Allah orders justice and good conduct and giving to relatives and forbids immorality and bad conduct and oppression.}[Quran 16:90]. It is reported that Salmaan Al-Faarisi said: "Your Lord has indeed a right on you, and your own self has indeed a right on you, and your wife (and family) has indeed a right on you, so give everyone his right." Thereupon the Prophet said: "Salmaan has indeed spoken the truth." [Al-Bukhari] So your husband should fear Allaah and he should know that the accumulation of rights could break up marital relationship. If your husband intends to please Allaah, then he can achieve this by fulfilling your right as well.

On the other hand, we advise you to take it easy and to consider the circumstances of your husband who is calling to Allaah. A caller to Allaah has many responsibilities which are time consuming, and he needs someone to help him in fulfilling this task, so you have to be the best person to help him. Nonetheless, there is no harm on you to remind him of your right, with wisdom and in good and soft words, and inform him that he should balance between people's rights. It is good to show him this Fatwa. To conclude, we ask Allaah to enable us to do whatever He likes and He is pleased with. Allaah Knows best.

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