Assalaam Alikum.I am 35 years. For all these years of my marriage I have endured the ever worsening behavior of my husband.I am sick and tired of all the physical,psycological and emotional violence. I stay with him to protect my 2 boys.My husband every year tries to make me go back to my country,somehow obstacles come and I not go.Then he blames me.I have no house in my country and little money.I would sleep in the street to get rid of him.He threatens me with divorce,ask me how much money I have etc,etc.This is not life! I didnot maryy him to end up like this!Do I commit a sin if I ask Allah to get me rid of this man? I have nobody to speak for me,no one to help me. I write this at the risk of my life I feel it!Please advise.

All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad is His slave and Messenger.

The pillars of marital life do not straighten unless both spouses know the rights of their partner on them and fulfill them to their best ability. There is no doubt that the husband is required to treat his wife kindly as Allaah Says (what means): {And live with them in kindness.}[Quran 4:19].

We have already issued Fataawa 86618 and 88304 clarifying the rights of the wife on her husband and that the best people are those who treat their wives the best.

First of all, we advise you to earnestly supplicate Allaah to guide your husband to treat you kindly, as supplications are an important means of achieving benefits, about which many people are neglectful. Indeed, the hearts of the people are controlled by Allaah and He changes them the way He wishes. Therefore, you should earnestly supplicate Allaah especially at times when the supplications are most likely to be answered by Him, like when prostrating, during the last third of the night, and between the Athaan and the Iqaamah. We also advise you to seek the help of some righteous and pious people so that they would admonish your husband and clarify to him his religious obligations towards you, and frighten him about the bad outcome of injustice, as he might take heed and refrain from what he is doing.

In addition to this, it should be noted that the wife beautifying herself for her husband is a major reason for the affection between the spouses. Many wives complain about the bad conduct of their husbands whereas in reality they are the reason for that because of not beautifying themselves for their husbands, and both of the spouses are wrong in many cases.

If the husband still continues to mistreat you, you should take the matter to an Islamic court so that it will relieve you from the harm inflicted upon you and oblige the husband to do his religious obligations.

Finally, it should be noted that you should take it easy and be patient, and not give the matter more than its proper bounds. You should not be despaired as the devil whispers to the person to this effect while it is a grave major sin to despair of the Mercy of Allaah, and despairing is one of the characteristics of the non-Muslims. Allaah Says (what means): {…and never give up hope of Allaah's Mercy. Certainly no one despairs of Allaah's Mercy, except the people who disbelieve.}[Quran 12:87].