I was engaged to a girl and we made love for last 4 years.I never cheated her financially, emotionally & our marriage was due in 3 mths. But she cheated me financially & did not listen to me.She never bothered about me or my family but thought only about her family.They got things done from her emotionally although I told her not to do as it would affect our married life.I broke-up with her but by allah i never wanted to do this,she never left any choice for me & my family. I am feeling guilty since we made love for 4 consecutive years.But on the other hand she was never bothered about my family or making a rapport with them. She did not stand for me in front of her family.Please advise,should I marry her since my family feels she will never take care of me & be bothered only about her family.

All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad is His slave and Messenger.

A fiancé is a stranger (non-Mahram) to his fiancée until the marriage contract is conducted between him and her. Indeed, people happen to do these kinds of immoralities [i.e. Zina – fornication or adultery] because of being lenient in the relationship between the fiancé and his fiancée, so he ends up staying in seclusion with her, travelling with her and doing with her other matters which he is not Islamically permitted to do. What is worse is that their relatives be lenient about these matters; we seek refuge in Allaah from that.

Therefore, both of you are obligated to repent to Allaah and not do this sin again. For more benefit on the conditions of repentance, please refer to Fatwa 86527.

On the other hand, it is not permissible for the fornicator to marry the woman with whom he committed fornication except with two conditions: both of them must repent from Zina and they must make sure that the woman is not pregnant from Zina according to the most preponderant opinion of the scholars as we discussed in Fatwa 86903.

Therefore, if you both repent and this girl makes sure that she is not pregnant from Zina, then it becomes permissible for you to marry her. In case she does not repent, then she is no good for you (to marry) and you should look for a religious woman who has a good moral conduct.

What we say to you about her also applies to her in regard to you, i.e. she is only permitted to marry you if you repent to Allaah from Zina.

Allaah Knows best.