I am a mother of three children and for several years my husband has been telling me that he is going to marry another woman. Although I am his only wife, I do not feel that he fulfils my rights, because he is always either watching TV, sleeping, using the computer or out with his friends and does not return home until 1 a.m. Since I live in a country where none of my family members are present and I do not leave home and cannot bear the idea of my husband having another wife, this causes me great distress. I cannot even bear my children anymore. Out of severe anxiety, I have been supplicating against myself to die.

All perfect praise be to Allaah, the Lord of the worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, is His Slave and Messenger.

A believing man or woman feels comfort and tranquility when his purpose and inclination is in accordance with the Sharee‘ah (Islamic law). It is known that polygyny is a matter that Allaah The Almighty permitted for a man due to many reasons approved by the Sharee‘ah. Allaah The Exalted Says (what means): {And if you fear that you will not deal justly with the orphan girls, then marry those that please you of [other] women, two or three or four.} [Quran 4:3]

Being negligent of his marital duties, does not necessarily mean that your husband will be unjust in treating you as well as the woman whom he will marry. You should not concern yourself with this matter, for he might never marry another woman while you keep torturing yourself with these obsessive doubts.

We advise you to exert your utmost in beautifying and adorning yourself for your husband and doing everything that could draw his attention to you. Perhaps his interest in sleeping, watching TV, using the computer or going out is due to your negligence in this respect. This leads him to resort to these ways of amusement. Maybe if you make a better person of yourself, he might stop thinking of marrying another woman.

Wishing for death is impermissible, as Anas narrated that the Messenger of Allaah, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, said: “None of you should wish for death because of a calamity that befalls him; but if he has to wish for death he should say, 'O Allaah! Keep me alive as long as life is better for me, and let me die if death is better for me.'” [Al-Bukhari and Muslim]  

Allaah Knows best.