Assalaamu alaykum. My husband is very genuine and strictly follows Islam, but, as a wife, I do not get any opportunity to serve him or help him. He does not share anything with me regarding his personel health. He does not like to get any help from me or from others, so how can I get a reward from Allaah when he does not share his personal condition with me? Without my knowledge, he had an operation and came home without saying it; how could I know? He always lies to me about his health. If I force and ask, then he says that I am torturing him. I always want to be his caring wife, but he says that his health was spoiled because of me asking him questions about it. If he does not share this information or I do not ask, then how could I know what is happening with him? As a muslim wife, how am I to handle this situation? My husband says that I do not have the right to help him and that only he has the right to help me. What does Islam say? He gave me the right to handle all matters related to our family unit, but he did not gave me that right regarding his personal health. Please, answer me; does Islam till the husband to behave like this? What should I do? May Allaah reward you.

All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah and that Muhammad, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, is His slave and Messenger.

May Allaah reward you generously and making you keener on fulfilling the rights of your husband over you and showing kindness to him. You should know that as long as the wife fulfills her husband's rights over her and treats him kindly, she is not obliged to investigate his health condition to take care of him despite the fact that he dislikes it.

We advise you to continue to fulfill your husband's rights over you and take care of your home and family within what your husband approves, and you should not overburden him or persist on knowing his health condition as long as he dislikes it. However, you should help him with whatever he informs you of. And whatever he chooses to hide from you, you should respect his choice. You should not force your help on him in the matters that he chooses to conceal from you. There is no doubt that you shall be rewarded for fulfilling your husband's rights over you, taking good care of your home, showing keenness on doing righteous deeds, and showing kindness towards your husband.

For more benefit, please refer to fataawa 85308 and 85167.

Allaah knows best.