Assalaamu alaykum. How do we relax in the prayer when we are standing before Allaah?
The Prophet, sallallaahu 'alayhi wa sallam, was reported to have said, “…The coolness of my eyes has been made in the prayer (i.e., my comfort has been provided in prayer).” (Sunan An-Nasaa’i 3939; Darussalam graded it good.)
The Prophet, sallallaahu 'alayhi wa sallam, was also reported to have said, “Get up, Bilal, and give us comfort by the prayer.” (Sunan Abu Daawood 4986; Al-Albaani graded it authentic.)
These hadiths indicate that we should find relaxation in prayer. I assume that this means physical relaxation as well as mental relaxation, but perhaps I am wrong? When one is standing in prayer before Allaah, the Lord of the worlds, as if they are standing before Him on the Day of Judgment, how can they not be terrified inside? I do not mean terror in terms of despairing of Allaah’s mercy, but terror in the realization of the fact that we are standing before our Creator for reckoning, hoping that He accepts this from us. However, if one is overcome with fear of Allaah in the prayer, then how can they relax mentally or even physically? Is the prayer supposed to be more of a meditative, peaceful experience, or is it supposed to be a tense, fearful experience of caution? I feel that I cannot understand how it can be both – I feel like I can only be overcome by one main emotion at a time. How can one relax if one is also standing fearfully before Allaah? How can the heart, the mind, and the body focus on peace and love and fear all at the same time, or is that actually possible? Is it fear or peace? What are we supposed to feel in the prayer ? May Allaah reward you.

All perfect praise be to Allah, The Lord of the worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allah and that Muhammad is His slave and Messenger.

First of all, we ask Allah to enable us to do good and make us and you among those who find the comfort of their eyes in the prayer.

What we can say to you is that the fear of Allah does not contradict loving Him and finding comfort with Him. The content of the heart is by conversing with Allah (i.e. when one is in prayer), and the comfort of the eye is with Him. The praised fear of Allah is not that which involves despair in Him; rather, it is a fear that makes the person more submissive and makes him flee more to Allah, because it is a fear that is always coupled with hope.

Ibn Taymiyyah said, “Fear always includes hope, or else one would despair. Likewise, hope entails fear, or else one would feel secure from the punishment of Allah (and thus refrain from performing good deeds and avoiding sins).”

As regards how a slave reaches the point where the prayer becomes the comfort of his eyes, then in order to clarify this to you we will quote the statement of Imaam Ibn Qayyim who dedicated much of his writings to the actions of the heart, in this regard. He said: 

“It should be noted that the prayer by which one fulfills the comfort of his eyes and his heart feels content is the one which includes six scenes:

1- The first scene: Sincerity; the incentive for prayer and its motive should be the desire of the slave in Allah and his love for Him, seeking to please Him, get closer to Him, and abide by His Order, in a way that the motive for it should not be seeking a worldly gain at all.

2- The second scene: Truthfulness (honesty) and advice, which is to fully devote one’s heart to Allah and exert one’s effort in truthfulness in turning to Allah and devoting all of one’s heart to this purpose in the best and most complete manner outwardly and inwardly.

3- The third scene: following and imitating, which is that one should be keen on following the Prophet in his prayer and pray in the same manner as he prayed.

4- The fourth scene: Ihsaan, which is to worship Allah as if one sees Him. This stems from the perfection of faith in Allah and in His Names and His Attributes. The rank of Ihsaan is the foundation of all the actions of the heart as this entails modesty, reverence, veneration, fear, love, turning to Him, trust, submission, and humiliation to Him. So the share of the slave in being closer to Allah depends on his share in the rank of Ihsaan, and it is depending on this that the prayer varies between one person and another, to the extent that you may find that the (difference in) excellence of the prayer between one man and another is like (the distance) between the heaven and the earth, while their Qiyaam (standing), Rukoo’ (bowing) and Sujood (prostration) are the same (outwardly).

5- The fifth scene: favor, which is to testify that the Favor is from Allah, Who made him stand in this position and qualified him for it and enabled him that his heart and his body stand in His service; were it not for Allah, nothing of this would have happened.

6- The sixth scene: admitting one's shortcomings and that no matter how the slave strives hard to fulfill the order and exerts all his efforts in this, he is still negligent, and the right of Allah, the Almighty, is greater on him.” [Excerpted from a letter from Imaam Ibn Qayyim to one of his brothers]

Allah knows best.