Her parents refuse to accept her as a Muslim and force her to participate in Christian rituals Fatwa No: 89664
- Fatwa Date:30-3-2005
I wrote to you before, and I had a few more questions to ask of you. (My Fatwa No. is 8528). I have embraced Islam and I believe that there is only one God, and I believe that Muhammad is a Messenger of God. Even before I emailed you, I felt this way about God and now I've come to terms with it. I have made the most awful mistake of telling one of my Christian friends how I feel, and now she's getting on my case about it. I still have the same problem as before, though. I live in a strictly community with no other Muslims to interact with and no mosques to go to (since I don't really drive that often). How could I practice Islam? Should I run away or secretly marry? I can't serve my God and please my parents at the same time!
My parents force me to go to church every Saturday and Wednesday, and I go to a very religious Christian school. Not only that, but I'm forced to be in the choir and sing about things I don't believe in! How am I supposed to stay at home and truly follow the Muslim faith? I don't see how God can get me out of this one. (I also have to participate in a re-enactment of Jesus's "last days" this weekend, something I have to do).
Anyways, I'm sorry my email is very out of order. I wish I could've put it together in a better style, but I'm kind of anxious right now. Please tell me what to do!
All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad is His slave and Messenger. We ask Allaah to exalt his mention as well as that of his family and all his companions.
First of all, all perfect praise be to Allaah Who guided you to Islam and enabled you to utter the two declarations of faith [Shahaadah], and we ask Him to make you firm and steadfast on His religion until the day you meet Him.
With regard to the problems that you are facing, first we have to tell you that you should take it easy and do not worry as you have a Lord Who will not lead you astray, so relax and calm down.
Allaah says (which means): {And whosoever fears Allaah and keeps his duty to Him He will make a way for him to get out (from every difficulty). And He will provide him from (sources) he never could imagine.}[Qur'an 65:2-3] Allaah also says: {And whosoever fears Allaah and keeps his duty to Him, He will make his matter easy for him.}[Qur'an 65:4]
Allaah further says: {And whosoever fears Allaah and keeps his duty to Him, He will remit his sins from him, and will enlarge his reward.}[Qur'an 65:5]. Therefore, you have to put your trust in Allaah, and if you are patient and sincere with Allaah, He will help you. Besides, you have to know, dear sister, that you are not the first one to experience such difficulties when embracing Islam. The companions of the Prophet experienced greater difficulties as they were tortured and killed because they became Muslims; however, they were patient and consequently were rewarded by Allaah. The disciples of 'Eesaa (Jesus), , were also harmed and tortured but were patient, so they were rewarded by Allaah. So you have to be patient and bear the difficulties. Allaah says (which means): {Do the people think that they will be left to say: "We believe" and they will not be tried? But We have certainly tried those before them, and Allaah will surely make evident those who are truthful, and He will surely make evident the liars.}[Qur'an 29:2-3]
So Allaah tests everyone, but we must be patient, and then the way out from these difficulties and the victory from Allaah would come.
We will summarize our advice in the following:
1) You have to supplicate to Allaah and seek His help as much as possible to make a way out for your difficulties and hardship. Indeed Allaah promised those who call upon Him to answer their call. Allaah says (which means): {And your Lord says, Call upon Me; I will respond to you.}[Qur'an 40:60]. Allaah further says (which means): {And when My servants ask you, [O Muhammad], concerning Me, indeed I am near. I respond to the invocation of the supplicant when he calls upon Me.}[Qur'an 2:186]. Moreover, the Prophet said: "Ask your Lord while being certain that He will answer your call, and know that Allaah does not answer the call of a person whose heart is unattentive when making the supplication." [At-Tirmithi].
2) Do not obey your parents in going to the church and do not obey the school in portraying 'Eesaa (Jesus) as a sign of respect to him. Also, do not participate in singing or other immoral practices. Inform all of them that they are obliged to respect your belief, and you know that in your country, the freedom of belief is protected for all and that you are free to choose whatever you want. You also know that no one can force you, according to the law, to do something that you do not want to do. If you are obliged to seek the help of the law (authorities) to protect you and your religion, then you can do so.
3) We advise you to contact the Council of American-Islamic Relations (CAIR) so that they would help you and defend your rights.
4) If it is possible, give us your address and the city/town where you live so that we try to guide you to the nearest Islamic Centre or the nearest Muslim community so that they would help you and stand by your side until you overcome your difficulties.
5) If you know that by staying with your family in your city/town you will be harmed in your religion, then you are obliged to move to another city where there is a bigger Muslim community and many Islamic Centres.
Finally, we remind you of the saying of Allaah (which means): {O, you who believe! Endure and be more patient…}[Qur'an 3:200], and His saying (which means): {And whosoever fears Allaah and keeps his duty to Him He will make a way for him to get out (from every difficulty).}[Qur'an 65:2-3]
So we ask Allaah to enable you to do what He loves and is pleased with.
Allaah knows best.