Raising children with various marital conditions Fatwa No: 90119
- Fatwa Date:6-6-2005
I currently have a question on file as 268929 not answered yet, in addition to that one I want to add if the children were born out of wedlock can they still be considered Muslims if I am raising them Muslim ages 8, 4, 6 months and if I remarry and their biological father does not practice Islam and myself and new husband are practicing what are the biological fathers rights over the children and also how should children be separated as male and female and at what age to do so? What is the best way to handle questions children have concerning Muslims and divorce and Haraam acts? I took my Shahaadah after the birth of my son and I am striving to please Allaah.
All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad is His slave and Messenger.
If you mean that these children were born due to Zina (fornication or adultery), then they are born out of an illegal sexual intercourse so they cannot be traced back to the person who fornicated with you because he is not considered their father in Islam; he has no right in them and they do not have any right in him, except the general right that a Muslim has upon another Muslim. Rather, these children have to be traced back to you. Since you are a Muslim, they are also considered as Muslims because they follow the religion of the parent who is a Muslim. Besides, you are obliged to nurture them according to Islamic creed and Islamic principles and you should be keen on doing so.
You have to endeavour to marry a righteous husband so that he will help you perform your religious obligations; he would remind you if you forget, and if you remember, he will help you in performing them.
As regards separating the beds of the children, it is desirable to separate their beds at the age of seven. The Prophet said: "If your children reach the age of seven, separate their beds." [Al-Haakim] This matter is even more emphatic when they reach the age of ten. The Prophet said: "Order your children to perform the prayer at the age of seven and hit them if they do not perform it at the age of ten, and separate their beds (i.e. at that age)." [Abu Daawood]
As regards the questions that the children have which you mentioned or other inquiries, then the children have to be raised believing in Allaah and His Names and Attributes, and how Glorified and Perfect is He, in His Divine Decree [whether it is good or bad], and that what He legislated is only good. One also has to emphasize the benefits and bounties of the Islamic legislation about what it enjoins and what it forbids. When they reach the age to understand, answer their questions or let someone who can answer them do so.
Allaah Knows best.