ASSALAMU ALIKUM I want to know about the duties of married daughter because my mother some times tell that daughters wont come to help her and when the inheritance is going to disturbute daughters will come at that time so this words hurt me a lot.i am away from my mother i visit her once in ayear but my 2 sisters visits her and take her to hospitl and help her in kitchen they too are married and have kids but still they visit her i have 2 brothers they too are away from my mother for earning purpose but my mother wont say the same words to them as she say to daughters. after listening that words from my mother i said to my mother that i dont want any thing from you and i dont want my share in inheritance give it to any 1 to whom you wish. so i want to know what i had done is right or wrong and what i have to do ? i dont want to hurt my mother she thinks that my father has earn money and he spend on us and spend on our marriages he has give dowry to groom in marriage so she wants us not to take our shares as islmic laws and tell us what we will give as your share you have to accept it and not to give any trouble to paents and brothers regarding shares matter so please advise me what to do ? she thinks that my brothers are spending money on them and look after their needs so they have more right on wealth.please advise me what to do ? jazzakALLAH

All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad is His slave and Messenger.

The children must be kind and dutiful to their fathers and mothers. Among being kind to the mother, is to keep in touch with her as much as possible. If you are far from her, then you may contact her with whatever way possible.

It should be noted that if a daughter marries, her obedience to her husband comes in priority over her obedience to her parents. Therefore, her parents have no right to blame her for her stay in her husband’s home and not with them, or to consider her as cutting ties with them by doing so, as this is injustice to her.

However, there are many forms of keeping ties (with the parents), among which is to telephone them in order to ask about them, gifting them and other means which are considered in the customs as keeping ties with them. In this regard, please refer to Fatwa 98733.

Whenever it is possible for the daughter to help her mother, she should do so as this is good and it is one of the best acts by which she gets closer to Allaah. Pleasing the parents is pleasing Allaah as clarified in the authentic Sunnah of the Prophet . For more benefit on the obedience to parents, please refer to Fatwa 87019.

Dear sister, your mother was wrong by saying such a statement which provoked you but you should forgive her especially if she is elderly or sick. On the other hand, you are wrong by responding to her with such a statement which could provoke her. We fear that this is considered as being undutiful to her, so you must repent to Allaah from that.

No matter how the parents are wrong or negligent, the children are not permitted to do the same with them. Rather, it is an obligation to fulfill their rights of being kind and dutiful to them in all cases as we clarified in Fatwa 83233. Therefore, you should try to win the pleasure of your mother as much as possible.

As regards the division of the inheritance, Allaah has determined it, so it is not permissible to prevent any male or female child from his/her share that is determined by Allaah to him/her because of him/her being negligent about his/her parents’ rights, and the share of another child cannot be increased because of his/her dutifulness and kindness to his/her parents.

If one of the parents did not act justly about the division of the inheritance, like increasing or decreasing the share of an heir from the inheritance of his/her dead parent, then someone should remind him/her of Allaah and clarify to him/her that what he/she did is wrong, and this may be done by some righteous people who may influence him/her. Moreover, if any one of the parents makes an unjust will, then this must be corrected so that justice can be done. Allaah Says (what means): {But if one fears from the bequeathed [some] error or sin and corrects that which is between them [i.e. the concerned parties], there is no sin upon him.}[Quran 2:182]

As regards the guardian of the wife giving money to her husband when she gets married, then this is a custom that is contrary to the Sharee’ah as we clarified in Fatwa 85873. Hence, preventing the girl from inheritance for this reason is correcting the mistake by a graver mistake.

Allaah Knows best.