Adult man asking parents to buy him pair of shoes
Fatwa No: 363238

Question

Assalaamu alaykum, Scholars. I am 19 years old, and I love my parents and do not provide for myself. I hardly ever ask my parents to buy me things for mere pleasure, and I do not like to do this; rather, I feel that it is disrespectful. Recently, I saw a pair of shoes that I love (for a reasonable price: 30€, more or less) and would like to buy, but as I said, I do not provide for myself. Is it permisible to ask my parents if they can buy those for me? Please, Scholars, do not merely tell me whether it is permissible or not, but rather tell me what the best scenario would be and whether this action is excluded from Birr Al-Waalidayn (dutifulness towards the parents). Would a Salaf (pious predecessor) or an Imam of the Salaf who would be dutiful to his parents perform such an action? Please advise me, Scholars. I really feel ashamed to ask them to buy these shoes for me, especially given that I am 19 years old, but if they were to do so, I really would like to return the money to them as soon as I could.

Answer

All perfect praise be to Allah, the Lord of the worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allah and that Muhammad, sallallaahu ʻalayhi wa sallam, is His slave and Messenger.

There is no harm on you to ask your parents to buy the mentioned shoes for you, especially if you intend to pay them back when you can afford it. This is not considered undutifulness towards your parents if they can afford to buy them, as you are not offending them by this request. Rather, many parents are happy to fulfill the needs of their children.

As for the practice of the Salaf, well, they preferred not to depend upon people. It was narrated that Ibn ʻUmar said, “During the lifetime of the Prophet, sallallaahu ʻalayhi wa sallam, I built a house with my own hands to protect me from rain and shade me from the sun; and none of Allah's creatures assisted me in building it.” [Al-Bukhaari, 8/66]

Allah knows best.

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