Asalaam aleykum. first i want to thank you for the quick response to my previous question regarding Riba. may Allah increase you in knowledge and grant you long life so that you continue to help us. amin. i have questions about Relating to non - muslims. 1st, i have been giving sadaqah to a poor family that claim to be muslims, but they no longer offer salat. i have tried to encourage them on many occasions to offer salat but no results even telling them to use sisal mats, they say their house is too dirty to pray in. (they have earthen floor and the small kids urinate and defacate in the house)i have also seen their children having amulets. on the other hand, my entire family are christians, and some are poor. i have been thinking of giving the sadaqah to my poor family members instead of that muslim family. i can only give one of them, is this choice right? 2nd question, my mother died while she was a christian (Allah knows best of the state of her iman) can i offer prayers to Allah to forgive her? can i give sadaqah on her behalf, i am her only child and she was my only parent ( i never got to know my father). i have seen some texts saying i shouldn't do it because she wasn't a muslim, someone else told me it's okay....please advise. jazakallahu khayr

All perfect praise be to Allah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allah, and that Muhammad, sallallaahu`alayhi wa sallam, is His slave and messenger.

As for the recommended charity, you can pay it out to your Christian relatives; however, it is impermissible to give the obligatory charity (Zakat) and the money paid for expiations to the disbelievers. Back to the recommended charity, it is yet better to give it out to the righteous among those people. In his Al-Majmoo', Imam An-Nawawi said, “It is recommended for the person to give out his (recommended) charity to the righteous and the needy. However, it is permissible to pay out this kind of charity to a man of immorality or a disbeliever: a Jew, Christian or Magian, and the person would obtain the reward of charity in general.” In the same way, obligatory charity should not be paid out to whoever entirely abandons prayer, since he is considered a disbeliever in the view of many scholars who base their opinion on the Prophetic Hadeeth reading, “There is nothing between a person and disbelief except abandoning Salah.’” [Narrated by the authors of the Books of Sunan and Saheeh Ibn Hibbaan] and His saying, “The covenant between us and them is prayer, so if anyone abandons it he has become a disbeliever.” [Narrated by At-Tirmidhi, An-Nasaa’i, and Ibn Maajah] So, obligatory charity, including Zakat and the money paid for expiations, should not be paid out to them.

As for asking Allah to forgive the mother that died in Christianity, evidence from the Quran and the Sunnah plus the Muslim scholars’ consensus indicate the impermissibility of asking Allah to forgive the disbeliever, even if he is a relative. We have elaborated on this point in Fatwas 90989 and 346345. As far as this topic of asking Allah, the Almighty, for forgiveness for the disbelieving parent in case they die in disbelief is concerned, the Fiqhi Encyclopedia states, “As for asking Allah to forgive them, it is prohibited – a ruling based on the Saying of Allah, the Exalted, {It is not for the Prophet and those who have believed to ask forgiveness for the polytheists, even if they were relatives …} [Quran, 9:113] This verse was revealed down when the Prophet asked for forgiveness for his paternal uncle Abu Taalib and when some of the companions asked for forgiveness for their associating parents. Also, Muslim scholars reached consensus on the impermissibility of asking for forgiveness after their death and for giving charity to their souls.”

The Encyclopedia also reads, “Jurists agreed that it is impermissible to ask forgiveness for the disbelievers, to the extent that some of them went beyond that to declare that this very act of asking for forgiveness for the disbelievers would turn its doer a disbeliever since it implies violation of the texts indicating that Allah, the Exalted, would never forgive polytheists and that disbelievers would dwell eternally in the Hereafter.”

Similarly, it is impermissible for you to give out a charity on her behalf after she passed away in disbelief, stressing that the reward of charity would not reach her. This is evidenced by the Hadeeth narrated by Abu Daawood,   on the authority of ʿAmr ibn Al-ʿAas that he wanted to emancipate fifty slaves on behalf of his father who made a well to do so, whereupon the Prophet said to him, “Had he been a Muslim and you had emancipated slaves on his behalf, or given sadaqah on his behalf, or performed the pilgrimage on his behalf, that would have reached him.” In ʿAwn Al-Maʿbood, he said, “This Hadith offers evidence that charity does not avail the disbeliever.”

However, there is no harm if you visit the grave of your relatives from the disbelievers to get admonition, but without asking forgiveness for them. That is because the act of visiting graves is originally permissible, yet asking for forgiveness is prohibited. Imam Muslim narrated in his Saheeh on the authority of Abu Hurayrah that the Messenger of Allah said, “I sought permission from my Lord to beg forgiveness for her, but it was not granted to me, and I sought permission to visit her grave, and it was granted to me so visit the graves, for that makes you mindful of death.” Imam Al-Bayhaqi on his part, narrated this Hadith in another wording “I sought the permission of my Lord to ask forgiveness for my mother, but He did not permit me, so I wept out of mercy for her because of the fire, and I have prevented you from visiting the graves, so you can now visit them.”

Allah knows best.