Dear Grand Imam Would you kindly please take a moment to have a precise glance on my issue, a very serious one, which I am suffering from last three months? Dear Grand Imam, I am 23 years old Afghan woman, married to my cousin three years ago, we have two children as well, but, I have an Aunt she is quite a bad woman through out her life and she had bother every one around her, now after 23 years including 3 years of my marriage she told me that she is going to reveal a secret about us (me and my husband).. I asked her what the secret was> she said “when you two (me and my husband) were children I have feed you two with my breast milk very secretly, not even your parents know about it, no one else know except Almighty Allah,” I asked her why she did like that to us she replayed “it was only and only my bad and evil motivation” Dear Grand Imam, as per Instruction in Queran such sort of Nikah is strictly prohibited (haram), isn’t it? But is it a sort of Razait? I think it is not, because it was only her evil motivation and bad will towards us, and we don’t knew it when we got married Dear Grand Imam, do you know about the strict tradition of Afghan society, specially about women affairs, if I requested my husband to divorce me, he will kill me even his self, and if even (if sky come to earth) he agreed to give me divorce our families will never accept it, it will be converted to a huge hostility among two families and lots of people will die, defiantly I will be the first victim and my husband the second, but this fire will never stop, it will go through generations, we have practical examples of such sort of hostility started from a very weak issue, Dear Grand Imam, in such sort of circumstances what should I do? I am feeling crime when touching my husband despite he loves me very much, what should I do please guide me, please look through all aviable materials.

All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad is His slave and Messenger. We ask Allaah to exalt his mention as well as that of his family and all his companions.

First of all, we would like to acknowledge that scholars differed concerning the prerequisites of affirming suckling along with its subsequent rules. Is the testimony of one woman enough or not?

The majority of scholars believe that suckling cannot be affirmed by the testimony of one woman; rather, the matter requires the testimony of two trustworthy men or a trustworthy man and two women. This is the position taken by Hanafi and Maaliki schools of jurisprudence. The Shaafi’ee scholars added to these cases, the testimony of four trustworthy women.

However, the Hanbali scholars take the position that the testimony of one satisfactory woman is sufficient for affirming suckling along with its subsequent rules. Their evidence for this is the narration of ‘Uqbah bin Al-Haarith wherein ‘Uqbah mentioned that he married the daughter of Abu Ihaab bin ‘Azeez, and then a woman came and said: "I suckled 'Uqba and his wife." ‘Uqbah said to her: "I do not know that you have suckled me, and you did not inform me." He then sent someone to the house of Abu Ihaab to inquire about that but they did not know that she had suckled their daughter. Then ‘Uqbah went to the Prophet in Al-Madeenah and asked him about it. The Prophet said to him: "How [can you keep your wife] after it has been said [that both of you were suckled by the same woman, and therefore, you are a brother and sister by suckling]?" So, he divorced her and she was married to another man." [Al-Bukhari] Another narration adds, the Prophet said: “Leave her alone.” [Al-Bukhari]

This position of accepting the testimony of one woman in affirming suckling is the position that we, here at Islamweb, adopt. However, we would like to draw the attention to the stipulation that is included therein, namely, that woman’s commitment to Islam and her conduct should both be satisfactory.

Ibn Qudaamah said: 'If one woman testified for suckling, then marriage [between the two who suckled from one woman] becomes prohibited [because they are considered a brother and sister by suckling] provided that the testifying woman was satisfactory (i.e. in her manners). It has been narrated from Imaam Ahmad, ‘…if the woman was satisfactory, she should be sworn in…'

Accordingly, we would like to say to the questioner; if the woman, who testified that she suckled you and your husband, harms others, and is of a bad conduct, as you mentioned, in this case, her testimony is not accepted, even according to the Hanbali position. Therefore, you should continue your marital life without any resentment, or a sense of guilt, because your husband is not prohibited upon you as she is considered a liar in her testimony. However, if she is a satisfactory woman, and she informed you that she suckled both of you, during any time of the first two years after birth, with at least five suckling to each one of you.  In this case, her testimony is accepted by those who take the position of accepting the testimony of one woman. 

Concerning the resulting harms of separating from your husband, we admonish you to seek the help of Allaah, and consult with the scholars available in your area in order to arrive to a suitable solution that avoid such harms.

Allaah Knows best.