Is it ok to disobey my husband because he is too strict? For example, I can't go out; he wants me to have a Mahram whenever I go out. If he is unhappy with me he says 'no' to any thing I want. Again, is it ok to disobey him and do what I want? I wanted a legal mediator (Hakam), but he refused.

Praise be to Allah, the Lord of the Worlds; and may His blessings and peace be upon our Prophet Muhammad and upon all his Family and Companions.

A woman is not allowed to disobey her husband except if he orders her to disobey Allah since no one is obeyed in disobeying Allah.

Strictness of a husband cannot be an excuse for a wife to disobey him, especially if it is in lawful matters such as staying at home or traveling with a Mahram, etc.

We would like to warn both of you that marital relations are based on love, affection, understanding each other and neglecting the shortcomings of one’s spouse.  Thus, a husband should not be so strict that he demands from his wife matters which are not compulsory in Islamic Shariah.  On the other hand, a wife should not oppose her husband if he orders something he perceives as safe for his wife.  She is rewarded for her obedience to her husband. 

There is no harm in aquiring a religious and reliable person as a mediator to settle their dispute if the couple are unable to resolve their own disagreement.

We ask Allah to solve the problems of all Muslims.

Allah knows best.