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Fatwa CenterThere is no time limit for rectifying your wife
Question
As salamu alaykum, my wife prays (Salah) irregularly, mostly does not cover herself as required in Islam, watches Western and European TV programs and movies, and listens to their music. Since, more then 2 years now I've been trying to guide her. Insha'Allah, by trying to be a good role model and giving her books, articles, video lectures and taking her to live lectures by various prominent scholars of our time. Please guide me step by step, in detail, on how to guide my wife in the best possible manner. Also, how long should I keep trying? We have two children, one is almost five, other almost three months, my fear is as they grow older they will take influence from their mother. Insha'Allah following your instructions; I will keep trying as long as you recommend, but if nothing works, do I then have to leave my wife (I do not wish to leave her, she is a good person and a good mother)? If I have to leave her, then as per Islam, who gets custody of our children?
Answer
All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad 
is His slave and Messenger.
First of all, it should be mentioned that you are not obliged to divorce your wife; however, the jurists 
stated that it is desirable to divorce the wife who is negligent of the rights of Allaah if she does not accept advice.
While clarifying the ruling of divorce, the Fiqh Encyclopedia reads: “Divorce would be desirable if the wife is negligent of the rights of Allaah which are incumbent on her, like the prayer and the like”.
However, there is no time limit for advice, so we advice you to keep advising her while combining between At-Targheeb [encouraging people to do good by mentioning Allaah’s promises and rewards] sometimes and At-Targheeb [warning people from evil by mentioning Allaah’s threats and punishments] at some other times, hoping that her situation will become better (i.e. that she will become righteous). Then, if you despair from her becoming righteous, and you predominantly think that she will not accept advice, then you should balance between the harm of keeping her as a wife and the harm that you and the children will experience after divorcing her.
In case divorce takes place between the husband and the wife, then the right of fostering the children is for the mother in principle, but this right moves to another female due to some reasons such as if the mother becomes dissolute and transgresses the limits of Allaah as clarified in Fatwa90461. However, it may be that if you divorce her, she will take the children away from you by law. She will be the only one to nurture them and what you fear will happen that they will be affected by her, whereas if you keep her, the children will be under your supervision.
Finally, we supplicate Allaah to guide your wife and rectify her situation.
For more benefit on the fostering of children after divorce, please refer to Fataawa 84618 and 82128.
Allaah Knows best.
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