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Wants to marry a new Muslim woman who has a son from Zina

Question

Assalam Alekum I wish to marry a girl who recently converted to Islam. She has a 6 year old son who was born out of wedlock when she was a Christian. She did not marry the father of the child because he had cheated on her. She has converted her son to Islam too. Can you please tell me what are the rights of the child’s father and does he have the right to interfere in child’s upbringing? Am I allowed to act as a guardian of the child and take care of that child’s worldly and spiritual needs for the rest of my life? My concern is with the child’s father who has a bad character and has two more children from two different women. I don’t want this child to be influenced by his father and later influence my children with my future wife. He has hardly ever paid child support for the child and has not shown much interest in parenting. He is not happy with the child’s new faith and claims that he will teach him whatever he wants (i.e. not Islam). He does not have a character that should be around a 6 year old child. Is it okay if we decide to restrict the child’s interaction with his father? Can the father, who was not responsible enough to keep his filthy desires intact even after he had a child be given the right to interfere in that child’s upbringing? Will Allah forgive me if I take this child away from his father for the child’s own religious and moral upbringing? Please enlighten me with other possibilities. Assalam Alekum

Answer

All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad  sallallaahu  `alayhi  wa  sallam ( may  Allaah exalt his mention ) is His slave and Messenger.

If this child was born out of wedlock (i.e. from Zina – fornication or adultery), then he is not traced back to the fornicator/adulterer; rather, he should be traced back to his mother. All rulings of inheritance and filiation with her would apply to him, because he is really her son.

Furthermore, she is obligated to protect her son and not give him to that non-Muslim man; as she is the one who is responsible for him. For more benefit, please refer to Fatwa 85430. As regards that man, he has no relation with the child and he does not have to support him and he has no form of guardianship over him.

Also, you have no form of guardianship over him [the child] whether or not you would marry his mother. You are, in regard to him, like any other Muslim individual with his Muslim brother, you should advise him, guide him, and prevent him from what harms him in his religion and in his worldly matters. Moreover, you are obligated to protect him if there is no one else to do so, and in this case you should teach him what he must learn of his religious matters provided that you are not harmed by doing so. Surely, you will be rewarded for doing so and you will not be sinful, Allaah willing. The Prophet  sallallaahu  `alayhi  wa  sallam ( may  Allaah exalt his mention ) said: “Allaah helps His Slave as long as His Slave helps his Muslim brother.” [Muslim]

It should be noted that it is an obligation in marriage to fulfill the conditions for the validity of the marriage contract among which are the consent of the guardian and the presence of two witnesses.

If a woman has no Muslim guardian, the one who marries her off is the Muslim judge or whoever acts on his behalf like the Muslim community such as Islamic Centres. In case there are none of these, she may authorize a Muslim man (to marry her off). Ibn Qudaamah  may  Allaah  have  mercy  upon  him said: “If a Muslim woman has no guardian and there is no Muslim ruler, then according to Imaam Ahmad, there is evidence which proves that a just and trustworthy Muslim man may marry her off with her permission.” For more benefit, please refer to Fatwa 88488.

Allaah Knows best.

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