Assalaamu alaykum. I told my husband that, acording to Islam, a married woman has the right to have her own home, meaning that she gets to live alone with her husband in peace, without somebody from his family living with them and causing trouble. His response was that if that is true, then why did the Prophet's daughter, Faatimah, live with her mother-in-law and even clean for her and do other things? What is your answer to this, Shaykh? Can you please give me some proof that it is the right of the woman to live in a separate home?
All perfect praise be to Allah, the Lord of the worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allah and that Muhammad, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, is His slave and Messenger.
Scholars stated that the wife has the right to live in a separate residence, and she has the right to refuse to live with her in-laws, including the husband's parents.
The Maaliki scholar Khaleel ibn Is-haaq wrote, “The wife has the right to refuse to live with her in-laws. Al-Qaadhi ‘Ulaysh said in his commentary on Minah Al-Jaleel, ‘...because she is harmed by them knowing everything about her and what she wishes to conceal from them, and even if it is established that living with them will not harm her.” [Mukhtasar Khaleel]
Among the evidence that scholars brought forth to prove that the wife is entitled to a separate residence is that the Quran uses the possessive pronouns "your houses" and "their houses" in reference to women and wives. The possessive case here indicates that they reside (privately) in these houses, not that they own them. Al-Qurtubi said, “This is the indication of the possessive case with regard to women and their houses in the verses. For instance, Allah, the Exalted, says (what means):
· {And remember what is recited in your houses of the verses of Allah and wisdom.} [Quran 33:34]
· {And abide in your houses...} [Quran 33:33]
It indicates residence, not ownership.” [Tafseer Al-Qurtubi]
There are two points that are worth mentioning here:
First, it is not a condition that the marital house be owned by the husband; it could be a rental house, as stated by the Shaafi‘i scholars. Ash-Shirbeeni wrote, "It is not a condition that the marital house be owned by the husband; rather, he may accommodate her in a house that is endowed (Waqf), rented, or borrowed...” [Mughni Al-Muhtaaj]
Second, the spouses should strive in reaching mutual understanding to the best of their abilities and avoid discord lest divorce takes place and the family breaks up. The fact that Faatimah stayed with the mother of ‘Ali, may Allaah be pleased with all of them, and served her – if it is true – does not contradict the fact that she had the right to live in a separate house and that she was not obliged to serve her mother-in-law. If she did so, this was out of her kindness and good manners.
Allah knows best.
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