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Question

Can you help me? I have been married for nearly 2 years now and I am quite happy, but my problem is that for 1 and a half years nobody knew we were married because my husband was afraid that people would talk about him being with me, because I used to be non-Muslim. I reverted to Islam 2 years ago and I don't understand why people don't realise that I have changed now, I practice, I pray, go to both open and closed study circles/meetings, I go to Islamic camps, read Qur'an. This isn't the main problem, the problem is my husband forbids me to go to the area I used to go to before I was Muslim because the people I used to be friends with live there (these friends were men, but I don't even look at men anymore I always walk with my head down in public) I want to know if he has the right to forbid me from going to this place. Also just one more thing we are members at a certain video shop which I went to the other day to take a video back and when I was leaving a man I used to know gave Salam and told me to give Salam to my husband, so when I got home I told him about because I don't keep anything from him and now he has forbidden me from going to that video shop because I told him about that man, that man was one I knew from before I was Muslim. Is this Islamicly right or is my husband just too jealous?

Answer

All perfect praise be to Allah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allah, and that Muhammad  sallallaahu  `alayhi  wa  sallam ( may  Allaah exalt his mention ) is His slave and Messenger.

The honor given to a woman by Allah is greater than any honor claimed to be given to her by man-made rules. Allah has granted her a great protection and reserved her all rights. Hence, Allah made the men responsible of her expenditures, protection, looking after her and fulfilling her needs; in return He Commands women to be obedient to their husbands. Therefore, the wife should ask her husband's permission to leave her house, let him know where and when she is going and with whom she holds her meetings etc., all these matters come under the obedience of her husband. He cannot carry out his obligation towards his wife except when he is aware of such matters. Therefore, you are obliged to obey your husband and not visit those places you used to go to and where you had men friends. This is to protect your honor as well as your own self. You know the bad consequences that result from men and women getting mixed. In order to protect women from being harmed or tortured physically or mentally by men, as is common practice nowadays that cannot be denied, Allah forbids men and women to get mixed together. You should thank Allah as He granted you such a nice husband, who looks after you and is concerned about your honor. You should thank Allah as you did not fall in the hands of a dissolute man who does not care about his wife and does not pay any attention to her affairs.

Similarly, you have to be thankful to Allah that He has Rescued you from darkness and Guided you to the light of Islam. This is a great Blessing of Allah. So, you should always remember Allah, praise Him, and not violate His rulings.

You should also supplicate Him to grant you steadfastness in His Faith. Finally, we inform you that having a membership in a video shop is permitted only if the video tapes do not contain any forbidden matters such as music, dissoluteness, unveiled women, wrong ideas and false beliefs, etc.

Allah Knows best.

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