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Fatwa CenterHer fiancé wants to know everything about her past
Question
I have a problem and I need your help. 15 months ago I met a man honest religious, smart, hard worker. We were to be married. I love him and respect him very much. He also helped me get closer to Allaah. The problem is he is kind of a man wants to know everything I do or everything that has happened to me in past. He found out that there was something I didn't tell him that happened to me in past and he felt I was hiding something so I decided to tell him. He got very angry and told me was this so hard to tell him was it hard to tell him the truth. I didn't tell him because I was afraid of loosing him and just wanted to protect our relationship. He said to me that he wants to know everything even if one of my hairs falls of my head. I told him that I'm sorry and to forgive me but he seems distant and I almost lost him. We still talk I still love him and respect him a lot for what he is and because he is very close to Allaah. He also told me that he cares about me and misses me some times but not like before...and that he doesn't know what will happened to our relationship. I don't want to loose him. What should I do? I need your advice.
Answer
All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad is His slave and Messenger. We ask Allaah to exalt his mention as well as that of his family and all his companions.
We supplicate Allaah to protect you from evil, grant you a happy life and steadfastness on His religion.
Dear sister, we, as Muslims, should trust in Allaah and follow all His commands as much as possible. Indeed, obedience of Allaah always leads to a good end, while His disobedience results in loss and failure.
After considering your matter, we advise you to cut off all your relations with this man since it leads to many harms and strengthens Satan against you. Islam does not allow you to have any personal relation with a marriageable man even if he is religious and sincere. There is no room in Islam for the relations before marriage or out of the marriage. For details, please read Fatwa: 84281.
It is not allowed in Islam to inform the others about the sins one commits or had ever committed. The details are mentioned in our Fatwa: 83573.
Now leave the matter to Allaah, asking Him to grant you a loving, caring, and pious husband. Supplicate Allaah humbly and sincerely to provide you with a pious man as a husband.
Generally those who are eager to delve into the past of their wives have a despotic, jealous, malicious and controlling nature. Loving and noble husbands forget the past, overlook the normal shortcomings to have a happy life.
May Allaah grant you a pious and loving husband and grant you a happy life.
Allaah knows best.
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