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Fatwa CenterIn love with a man but her parents refuse him
Question
I am a practicing Muslim who's in love with a Muslim guy but my parents are against him especially my mother for some reasons...But things have gone too far between us, he knows some of my secrets which I'm afraid my parents will found out. What should I do?
Answer
All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad is His slave and Messenger. We ask Allaah to exalt his mention as well as that of his family and all his companions.
The blessing of being steadfast on the right path requires one to be far away from the reasons of afflictions and temptations, like avoiding establishing any relationship that is forbidden in Islam, so you are obliged to repent to Allaah and avoid any forbidden matter with this man.
There is no doubt that the best solution for those who love each other is to marry, as the Prophet 
advised the two persons who loved each other; for more benefit please refer to Fatwa 90692. So if this man is suitable as a husband, i.e. competent, religious and has a good moral conduct, then try to convince your parents to accept him as your husband. You should seek the help of the righteous and pious people in this regard and the help of those who may influence them. Then if they accept, all perfect praise be to Allaah, otherwise you should obey your parents and totally forget about this man. However, if your guardian refuses you to marry this man without a sound reason, then you may take the matter to an institution which deals with issues of the Muslims so that they may remove the harm off you, and marry you off to this man or to any other man. Nonetheless, we do not understand what you mean by your statement "things have gone too far between us", and "he knows some of my secrets"; if you mean that you committed something forbidden with him like fornication and the like, then both of you should repent to Allaah and not inform anyone about it. If your parents came to know about the matter, then you may use Tawriyah (saying something which has more than one meaning and intending a meaning different from what the listener is likely to understand), when speaking to them. In this regard you may refer to Fatwa 90618.
To conclude, you are obliged to immediately cut any relationship with this man until you conduct a correct marriage contract with him. For more benefit, please refer to Fatwa 81356.
Allaah Knows best.
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