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Fatwa CenterHer husband asked her to conceal their marriage from first wife and his family
Question
Asalaam alaikum wa rahmatullah wa barakatuh. I need advice on this please. About 6months ago i got married to man who religious alhamdulillah. He has his first wife who had three children. When he asked me to mary me 6months ago, i spoke to my parents about it. And my father even without seeing him he agreed having the trust on me to have seen the right man. With my brother being present he later spoke to my father on phone because we were not in the same town and my father accepted my brother to perform the nikah. we spoke about some conditions we would like to lay down before the nikah and one of them was not tell his first wife that we are married and his family. This was because they never wanted him to marry another wife and he did not want to cause any problems with his family. I agreed to this condition without talking to my parents about it. Till now my family does not know about this kind of condition. Of recent i feel like he is distant with me. So i told him and he went on to say i'm not patient which made me upset because i feel i put up with almost not seeing him at all and now he says i'm not patient. we later appologised for all and made peace. Please advice me if our marriage was valid and acceptable in islam and if there are any virtues to this kind of condition and what problems it may cause. Thanks alot and may Allah reward you for your help. Ameen
Answer
All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad is His slave and Messenger. We ask Allaah to exalt his mention as well as that of his family and all his companions.
There are some conditions for a marriage to be Islamicly valid. Those conditions are mentioned in Fatwa 83629. The presence of the guardian of the bride (or an agent he authorizes) and the presence of two witnesses are among the most important conditions. So, if your marriage was completed in the presence of your guardian (or his agent) and two witnesses, then your marriage is valid and you are a wife to this man. Your brother's guardianship is allowed as long as your father deputized him and there are no religious impediments in his guardianship such as being immature etc.
As for the condition of not informing his first wife or his family about this marriage; some scholars are of the opinion that it is not correct while the majority of the Muslim scholars 
are of the opinion that it is allowed. Therefore, you have to abide by this condition but you should take all precautions to protect your rights and your children's rights if any. You should document (register) this marriage legally in order to avoid losing your rights and your children’s in inheritance, lineage, etc.
It was better not to accept the condition except with the approval of your family.
Allaah Knows best.
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