Extent of obedience to parents
Fatwa No: 271255


Asalamu alaykum, If my parents tell me not to stay up at night and to always wake up at 9.00 in the morning, do I have to obey them. Also do the parents have a right to only allow me to use my phone for an hour a day or is it my choice. Also am I allowed to go on any (not haram) sites or only the ones my parents allow me to. I know its important to obey parents but, do I have to obey them in everything. Jazakallah khair.


All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, is His slave and Messenger.

The parents have great rights in Islam, and it is a religious obligation to obey them and be kind to them. The children should obey their parents as much as possible if it is not in disobedience to Allaah.

In general, the scholars stated that obedience to parents is not absolute; it is only an obligation if there is a benefit for the parents while there is no hardship on the children. For information about the statements of the scholars in this regard, please refer to Fataawa 131695 and 86982.

On the other hand, parents generally want to obtain what is beneficial for their children and repel harm from them. The matters which you mentioned in the question, like not staying up late, not visiting some websites, and using the phone for a given period of time, parents generally intend to solicit what is in the interest (of the child) in those things. So, it appears – and Allaah Knows best – that it is an obligation to obey them. This is even more emphatic if the parents forbid their children from something which they (the parents) own, like in using the internet, as the property of a Muslim is not lawful for anybody to take (or use) except with his own proper consent.

As regards waking up at 9 o’clock in the morning, if what is meant is that they dislike you sleeping after that hour, then this is good, because many benefits may be missed because of oversleeping.

Allaah Knows best.

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